Howdy Cherry!
None of that sounds insane at all. Well not to me at least...I think the exact same way. If it comes in a box or in a can then I *can and will* make it!

I have some good recipes for you to try. I do not have one for corn torillas though, but now I want one and as soon as I find it I'll post it. Here we go....
Crackers:
When searching online for cracker recipes, try searching for hardtack, pilots bread or wafer bread. Some doughs can be kept in the refrigerator or freezer until ready to roll. Most baked crackers will store for a week or so, and can be revived in a low oven should they loose their crispness. A lot of the recipes call for a food processor....I just do it by hand and it's fine. Do not overmix to avoid a tough cracker. After the liquid is added you should only mix/process until the dough *just* comes together and is good enough to handle. Use an extremely sharp knife or a pizza cutter to cut the cracker dough. There are some rolling tools that will give you a decorative edge if you like that.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SIMPLE WHITE CRACKERS
1 cup all purpose flour
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp sugar
1 Tbsp unsalted butter, cut up
1/3 cup plus 1 Tbsp milk
Kosher salt, for topping
Heat oven to 325*
In food processor, pulse flour, salt, and sugar.
Add butter and pulse until mixture resembles coarse meal.
With machine running, gradually add milk and process until dough comes together.
Transfer dough to lightly floured surface.
Roll into a 10" x 12" sheet, 1/16 of an inch thick.
Sprinkle with Kosher salt and roll *gently* to push the salt into the dough.
Cut into 2 1/2" squares.
Carefully transfer to an ungreased baking sheet.
Liberally pierce with fork.
Bake 20-25 minutes, until *just* brown and firm to the touch.
Transfer to wire rack to cool.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
WHEAT SQUARES
1 cup all purpose flour
1 cup whole wheat flour
2 Tbsp taosted wheat germ
2 tsp salt
2 Tbsp unsalted butter, cut up
1 Tbsp honey
3/4 cup milk
1 egg white
Kosher salt for topping
Heat oven to 325*
In food processor, pulse flours, wheat germ, and salt.
Add the butter, pulse until mixture resembles coarse meal.
With machine running, gradually add honey and milk.
Process until dough comes together.
Transfer to lightly floured surface and dived into 4 equal parts.
Roll each into 10" x 10" sheet, 1/8" thick.
Transfer to ungreased baking sheets.
Score into 1 1/2" squares.
Pierce each square 3 times with a fork.
Brush egg white over dough and sprinkle with Kosher salt.
Bake for 20 minutes until crackers become stiff.
Turn with spatulaand bake another 6-8 minutes or until crackers are light brown and firm.
Transfer to wire rack to cool.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SEASME ROUNDS
1 cup all purpose flour
1/2 tsp salt
1/8 tsp freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp grated lemon zest
2 Tbsp fresh thyme, chopped (1 Tbsp dried)
3 Tbsp seasame seeds
2 Tbsp unsalted butter, cut up
1/4 cup cold water
1 large egg white
Kosher salt for topping
Heat oven to 350*
In processor, pulse together flour, salt, pepper, lemon zest, thyme,and 2 Tbsp of the sesame seeds.
Add butter and pulse until mixture resembles coarse meal.
With machine running, add 1/4 cup cold water and process until dough comes together.
Transfer to lightly floured surface and divide dough into 2 equal parts.
Roll out to 1/8" thickness.
Cut into 2 1/2" circles and transfer to ungreased baking sheet.
Brush egg white over rounds and sprinkle with remaining sesame seeds and Kosher salt.
Bake 20-25 minutes, until firm to the touch.
Transfer to witre rack to cool.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ARMY HARDTACK
4 cups flour (perferably whole wheat)
4 tsp salt
About 2 cups Water
Pre-heat oven to 375°
Mix the flour and salt together in a bowl.
Add just enough water (less than two cups) so that the mixture will stick together, producing a dough that won’t stick to hands, rolling pin or pan.
Mix the dough by hand.
Roll the dough out, shaping it roughly into a rectangle.
Cut into the dough into squares about 3 x 3" and ½" thick.
After cutting the squares, press a pattern of four rows of four holes into each square. Do not punch through the dough.
Turn each square over and do the same thing to the other side.
Place the squares on an ungreased cookie sheet and bake for 30 minutes.
Turn each piece over and bake for another 30 minutes.
The crackers should be slightly brown on both sides.
The fresh crackers are easily broken but as they dry, they harden and assume the consistentency of fired brick.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SWEDISH HARDTACK
1 c water
3 Tbsp vegetable oil
3 Tbsp honey
3 cups rye flour (or 1 1/2 cups rye & 1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour)
1 1/2 Tbsp brewer's yeast (optional)
1/4 tsp salt
Oven to 425*
Mix liquids together.
In a separate bowl, mix dry ingredients.
Combine the mixtures, stirring to moisten throughout.
Form a ball.
On a floured surface, flatten the dough, and roll out thinly.
Cut into squares and prick each cracker with the tines of a fork a couple of times.
Transfer to lightly greased baking sheets.
Bake about 8 minutes, checking to be sure not to over-brown.
It is best served warm.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PILOTS BREAD
2 1/2 cups old-fashioned or quick oats.
3 cups unbleached flour.
1 1/2 tsp salt.
1 tsp baking soda.
In a separate container, mix:
1 1/2 cups buttermilk.
3 Tbsp honey.
1/2 cup melted butter
Oven to 450*
Combine the two sets of ingredients.
When the dough is thoroughly mixed, roll it out on a floured board to a thickness of about a quarter inch.
Cut out circles of dough with a large drinking glass dipped in flour and put them on a lightly greased cookie sheet.
Bake for about 6 minutes.
Let the hardtack cool on a wire rack before serving with jam or jelly.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HARDTACK
1 1/2 Cups milk
4 Cups flour
4 Tbsp butter
3 tsp brown sugar
1 1/2 tsp salt
Oven to 400*
Mix the ingredients into a dough and roll out to a thickness of about 1/2".
Cut into squares.
Prick the squares with a fork or knife.
Place them on a lightly greased baking pan and bake for 20 to 30 minutes, until golden brown.
Yield: 24 2 x 2-inch bars.