amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

Dinabu · 02-10-2004, 11:46 AM

Yesterday at gymnastics, they gave out valentines and candy...
I never even thought about it (OK, so I thought Valentines was next week and I had a week to come up with somethingROTFL)
Anyway, I let her have the 3 pieces of candy she got with little cards, but I wasn't thrilled about it. There was one other little girls who said " I can't eat THAT" (secretly I was cheering her onLOL) but the little girl that was giving it was really hurt. Thankfully, in the 3yo class, they don't do candy normally (they get stamps on their feet) and Hailey was beyond thrilled to get it

Now the bigger girls do get candy every class. They pick out a candy out of the bucket after class...at first it was easy...mine are nut allergic so they were told no candy, and everyone was OK with that. Then the coaches went and specifically got nut-free candys for everyone (smarties and jolly ranchers) I didn't know what to say and the girls were all excited to be abel to do everything everyone else did so I let them have their 2 candies a week... Not sure where to go from here...is it worth the argument in the long run? I dunno...sigh....maybe I could let them "trade" in their candies and we'll go to the store and get them something better...I dunno.

So my long winded question is....LOL
How do you deal with Candy (given from people esp at this time of year? We HS, so I don't have school parties, etc to deal with and wasn't expecting it at gymnastics!

Kbsmama · 02-10-2004, 12:25 PM

I'm with ya, mama. I just got a call from one of the mothers in DS's kindergarten class. I have offered to donate stuff for parties. I think I should have gotten in on the planning because every time I am horrified by what they are asking me to do:

Halloween--jigglers or packaged rice krispie treats to decorate with frosting and candies

Christmas--jigglers or juice and some sprinkes for cookie decorating

Valentines--jigglers or individual boxes of converstation hearts for bingo (and snacking).

I said I'd have to pass this time because I have no plans to go to the grocery between now and Friday morning. I did buy stuff for past parties (I was very preganant at Halloween and had a new baby at Christmastime). I was thinking I should have offered to make a big bucket of heart-shaped bingo markers! I am now thinking I should have made jigglers every time using fruit juice! I wonder if anyone would have figured that out. Maybe I'll call and see if she got anyone to do the jigglers...

Mom2Steen · 02-10-2004, 12:45 PM

For halloween and xmas a few parents in DS's pre-school class brought candy and put it in everyone's cubbies. I carried it to the car for DS and let him have one piece when we got home. The rest "magically" disappeared (garbage can) when DS wasn't looking. He never did ask about it. I did have him thank the children and parents of course.

We aren't completely candy-free but we try to limit it to a treat when he gets his hair cut (incentive to sit still since he really doesn't like people touching his head) and plain chocolate for special occasions. He really prefers plain chocolate anyway.

Maybe you can get the girls to "trade-in" their candy for something else. Not sure what but x pieces of candy could be traded for renting a video, a special art or craft supply, helping mom bake "healthy" cookies, etc.

Good luck.. It's hard going against the overwhelming tide but sometimes it is worth it.

arasmama · 02-10-2004, 01:34 PM

I just let them eat it and try not to make a huge deal out of it. I'm afraid of making it one of those things that they desperately want because they are never allowed to have it. I don't know about once a week at gymnastics though. We get it more when they get a haircut or at halloween. My mom is also very very bad about giving them candy, although she restricts it to chocolate because it isn't as bad for their teeth. <sign> grandmas

Dinabu · 02-10-2004, 01:47 PM

I don't think a candy here and there is all that bad and DH doesnt think its a big deal even at gymnastics, but i was thinking about it and its that its right at dinnertime (they have class from 4:15-5:45) so when we leave, we come home and eat dinner, and that they are using it as a reward...I don't mind so much on holidays and special treats, birthday parties, etc. so they don't get to be older and gorge themselves on the forbidden foodsLOL

Angela, I love the idea of the craft! I didn't even think of that, I was thinking more along the lines of a different food, but i bet they would go for the craft kit and we'll do the candy once in awhile. Ill see what they think. Alot of the trouble is Ci sees they have "something" and wants it too, so will cry all the way home, and shes not happy with her snacks anymoreLOL
Thanks!!

Oh and good luck with the gigglers, mama...theres something about those that gives me the willies!LOL

MotherMoon · 02-10-2004, 01:56 PM

First, I would complain to the gym director about what kind of healthy habits they are trying to instill in children (future athletes) by giving them candy. Not to mention performing for a reward. When I was in gymnastics (100 years ago mind you

), we were not allowed sodas or anything "unhealthy" in the gym. We could have these high fat pb cracker stuff but nothing sweet, no honeybuns, etc. And these were things brought from home. We got nothing but satisfaction at our performance after class.

Now, for holidays, it is a big issue with us. A lot of candy has dairy or gluten in it. So, it is off limits to Sam. So, I have made it pretty clear, give pencils, erasers, crayons, stickers (big winner there), etc. instead of candy. Or give fruit. A bag of organic apples costs no more than a bag of candy. Shoot, here it is less than the candy.

When we do receive it, I confiscate it (else I have candy goo in the carpet), take out what I absolutely will not let them eat (no name junk in unlabeled packages - we got tons of that at Halloween from school party) and trash it out of eyesight ASAP. Then I ration the rest until they stop asking (usually about two to five days) then trash the rest or let DH take it to work. Sam remembers the candy longer than Beth. Maybe because she gets soo few treat with her diet. Beth gets no more but she is not limited as to type and thus may not be so anxious to have some.

HTH!

Akayasmama · 02-11-2004, 10:11 PM

I'm probably the odd man out, but I think that the occasional piece of candy is perfectly fine. As a child, I had absolutely NO candy or junk food whatsoever and as an adult these are the foods that I crave and have to really exercise a lot of self control when I'm around them. I guess I'd probably just let my own kids eat the candy if I were in your position. Alternatives to actual candy : hm trail mix, granola and yogurt or raisons and yogurt, tofu fruit smoothie-(ice, silken tofu, fruit of choice, a little honey pureed).

mamabear · 02-12-2004, 12:56 AM

We don't make a big deal out of occasional candy here, either. Katie is totally the type of personality where if it's forbidden, it is *immediately* focused on. Plus I want to help both my children learn moderation and self-control rather than have me do that for them.

But, I too would be talking to the gym and asking why they are giving them candy after class. It seems out of place when it is a health-oriented activity, and I don't like the idea of rewarding them with food. That bothers me more than the fact that it's candy per se.

BlueRoseMama · 02-12-2004, 11:54 AM

I am with Amoreena, Allison and Lauren on this one... I let it be. Don't buy it myself, and tell them it is not good for them. (which my son promply says, "Yeah but it tastes really good!"

) The more I make a fight of it, the worse the sugar craving gets, and with Alex being in school it is nearly pointless to resist... he will just eat it all before I pick him up. And he is the least devious kid I know... He will even get in the car and tell me (all excited of course) that Mrs ___ gave them candy today and he didn't bring it home because they can't have it at home but he can have it at school. lol... so I gave up. They have candy about once every two weeks... and we make cookies too. Sugar is not the enemy in my opinion... We stick to things that have the least dye in them in our house. Red #40 makes Alex a little nuts. lol... But even that can be debatable under circumstances I can not control... I am not really one to have Alex being the "only kid" who doesn't get one. He is a little too sensitive for that.

Love Val

I did get the organic, soy dyed jelly beans for the Day 100 party today for Alex's class... and a bunch of stickers.

But it cost so much more I can't say I was not tempted to just get Runts... lol

Kbsmama · 02-12-2004, 01:31 PM

They're made by Nestle.

I remember when I worked at a daycare once, a mom brought fruit juice sweetened cookies for everyone for snack. One of the women that worked with me tasted them, declared them unfit, and said that the kids would not eat them. She served the cookies to the little girl whose mom brought them and graham crackers to everyone else. It still kills me to think about it. I thought they tasted pretty good, actually, and years later, they were a favorite treat for my kids.

That's kind of what I'm afraid might happen if I sent fruit juice jigglers.

amey · 02-12-2004, 05:36 PM

Hey Jody,
Don't tell them what they're made from!

I don't think it's that much of a switch to make fruit juice gelatin than Jell-O. I mean Knox gelatin is on all the shelves - just say you were going for slightly more nutrition than just citric acid and food coloring.

I wonder how mch different fruit juice and that agar-agar stuff is? The Super Baby Food mama talks about using that instead of gelatin.

And, it really annoys me when adults make sweeping statements like "kids will never eat this." My kid LOVES broccoli. He'd eat a crudite platter up alone. He loves whole wheat bread, fresh ground almond butter, almost any grain, and on and on. But adults always assume he'll only eat crap. Ugh. We went to a friend's house and they were getting take out pizza for dinner. She asked if I wanted her to make some extra chicken nuggets for Daniel (3) since she was making them for her son. Uh,, no. My kid eats pizza. She seemed surpised by the idea. She let her kid "try" some and holy cow! The kid actually liked it. Imagine. Sometimes I think he is the only 3 year old not living on chicken nuggets and waffles.

~amey (whose kids DO get alot of crap, but they like the real stuff too)

AvalonMom · 02-12-2004, 06:27 PM

Totally off topic, buuuuuut in reponse to amey, my 17month old daughter loves pizza. Come from her dad I think.

I used to cut up the slices for her but now she will only eat it "like daddy" holding the slice. Its really cute.
[/off topic]

Dinabu · 02-12-2004, 11:47 PM

I really appreciate them

Sometimes my ideals don't mesh with my everyday livingLOL The girls were happy to trade in their candies for a better snack for on the way home (it takes us about 40 minutes to get home) so Cierra doesn't feel bad

since they said they were hungry. and we'll divide it up for everyone after dinner, since they always get the smarties.

I was surprised to at them giving out rewards like that and for the whole candy thing. They even have a vending machine upstairs with pop and candy/chips etc because parents rallied for it since alot of siblings go there after school. drives me crazy, but I seem to be the only one who finds it out off place (as they sit on the bleachers with their diet cokes and bags of doritoes

It is strange for a gym and i have left a few notes in the comments box, but I guess I'm the only one!

LOL about the pizza, too cute! mine like pretty much anything, but Cahner doesn't like sweet things, even ketchup...I sometimes wonder if hes really mine!LOL

3boysnagrl · 02-16-2004, 06:34 PM

you know... isn't gymnastics supposed to be *about* being healthy?

This always gets me... a workout place with candy and pop machines. THAT is certainly not really encouraging health!

I also get irritated with the candy. Every single party dh's squadron has - they give thes kids these BAGS of candy. LOTS of it... and then I get to deal with the sugar high kids bouncing off the walls at 10 pm. grrrrrrr