spiritual discussionsThis is the place at AW for mamas to learn about all different religions and beliefs, to ask questions, to give answers- all done with respect! if you don't have anything nice to say here- don't say anything at all.
Its Sunday again and I'm fighting with my family.
Zoey and Roman are saying they are too tired to go to church.
I woke Tom and he said he was up all the night before stressing on the funeral and didn't sleep well again last night. I woke Chelsey and she is the only one who says she wants to go - thats a good sign. And I want her to go.
But I started trying to get folks up and ready at 8:15 for the 9:30 service.
Its 9 now and I'm tired of nagging. There is childcare at the 8am and 9:30 service is sunday school. Not at the 11 - the kids come into the service - which would be fine for Zoey but Roman can't handle it. We've tried.
I finally told them all that I'll be going to the 11:00 service with Chelsey and Tom will stay home with the kids - and that next week we're all going and that is final.
But its NOT the way to start a day. I'm all upset and bummed and wanted to go to church as a family. We used to go every single Sunday and now its like once a month we go as a family, twice a month Tom and I go alone and Chels watches the kids. It really stinks and I am not happy about it.
__________________
~Barb
Mama to Chelsey,19, Zoey,8 and Roman, 5
Happy Holidays from my family to yours!
When I was a kid, it was never up for discussion. We were just expected to go. I wouldn't have even considered fighting it.
Have you tried doing something like planning something really cool and fun for a Sunday afternoon, so that they are all anticipating it and then when they won't get up, tell them that they won't be able to participate.
Or make sure they realize that every week they can't get up for church, they will have to go to bed an hour earlier on Saturday night.
My kids haven't refused to go to church... they beg to go actually and get very upset when we end up not going DH has been more than I have though. With 4 kids it seems like someone is sick or Malachi is having a hard day. So I will stay home with the boys. But, on days where everyone is healthy etc... we all go. I've prob said more than I wanted to stay home cuase I was up late whatever.
I'd start by trying to figure out why they don't want to go. Is it because they don't enjoy their time there? maybe getting involved in the children's ministry in order to help shape it in a direction that better suits your kids needs is an option? or maybe even trying different churches?
Do they dread going but enjoy it once they are there? sometimes its the whole transition thing...the bed is warm, I don't want to get my butt in gear and get ready, if I complain then staying home is an option,etc....
Can you talk about it as a family (in a way that gives them no condemnation for not going) so that they can hear how important going as a family is to you? maybe you can reach a solution that meets everyones needs?
__________________
Jennifer
Webb(20) Rebecca(16) joe(10)
Is the reason just being "too tired"? and if so, what time do they go to bed on Saturday nights? As a kid, I would have never thought that refusing to go was an option. We do give our girls say in whetehr they want to go because I don't want to push them, but they love it. They have actually talked us into going on a few occasions when we didn't want to spend the gas $.
__________________
How Time Flies ~ Luna Blue is Two!
Tree hugging, vegetarian, breastfeeding, cloth-diapering, home schooling, drum playing Step-Mama to my sweet Nico Sage and Mama to my curly Kaya Jade and wee Luna Blue. Lovin my hottie ~ J. Blogging From the Boonies My Etsy Shop
It's not an optional thing in our house. It's something that we all do together every Sunday. To us, it's not an option to go to a big family dinner, but only bring some of the family. We see church (eucharist) that way. If you feel that way (that experiencing the eucharist as a family is important), maybe you can explain that it's like going to Grandma's for Thanksgiving or something. It's just something we do. We might not be excited about it, but it's still something we do. And we usually end up loving it.
Of course, if Tom's not going, that blows my plan out of the water!
I am so glad that it wasn't an option growing up. I'm so glad that my parents chose a few key things to be firm about. We had a lot of flexibility on most things, but that wasn't one of them.
Barb - I think you are doing a great job with your family. You guys have a lot on your plate right now. Please don't feel that I am judging you with this post. I just re-read it and realized that it might sound that way. I just mean to say that I'm with you and feel that it's super important for a family to carve out that tiny bit of time to share with God together each week. I truly think it strengthens families!
__________________
married to Robert * mommy to Emma (04/2001) & John (09/2004)
ISO:
Giftable digital picture frame
someone to come do all my laundry
My kids don't have an option. We go to church as a family. We may sleep in and miss first service @ 9am, but then we're up and ready for 10:45 am service.
I'm sorry Barb! It IS hard when the family doesn't want to go (although we haven't had that issue here in years). Around here, it's just the thing we do. DH is a pastor so he has to be there unless he's on vacation, my oldest teaches Sunday School so she needs to be at both services (one to teach, one to go to service) and then the rest of us are there for the second service (I'm too lazy to get ready for first).
I agree that it's best to find out why they don't want to go - and also to make a family tradition with church. We used to have friends over or go to someone's house or go out to eat (when we had money) after church each week so it was fun to go. Maybe do something like that??
__________________
Ann
SAHM to 4 beautiful children Lauren ('90), Nicole ('92), Robert ('00) and Joanna ('02) and wife to Bob for 23 years.
They basically do stay up too late on Saturday night - which I will rectify. Roman has sensory issues - and a probably new PDD nos diagnosis, so being in school is hard for him anyway.
Today I went with Chelsey and it was a good day - she got a message suited for some of what she is dealing with, and then she and I stopped and thrifted for a bit before coming home.
I am going to suggest next week that we go as a family at 9:30 and then out to breakfast - I think that might make a difference. Plus there is talk of adding sunday school to the 11am service in the next few months.
anyway, thanks for listening lol . Will figure it out.
In our house, it isn't a choice. It's like going to school or the dentist. We all go. It is a family affair, and we just don't make it a choice.
__________________
Hayes, mama to Celeste, Lydia, William, Samuel, Isaac, and Joseph
This is Joseph at 1 month old. He is next to his newest friend, Mary Frances, just minutes after she was born. She weighed 8 pounds 10 ounces and was 18.5 inches long!
Well, I am sort of in the same boat. Stephanie loves church and Ava cannot stand it. Once dh deploys she will have to go. Right now they both stay home and then head off for a nature hike at a local nature preserve. I don't know what I will do once he is gone. I was forced to attned church (Catholic) as a child (until I left for college) and didn't like it at all. It turned me off religion for a long time. Had there been children's programs during the service I would have felt much better about going. Is there another church in your area that does offer children's services? I know it's a pain to search for a new church, so maybe that's not an option for you. It's good that Chelsey had a nice time there. Maybe just wait it out until they start up the Sunday School classes? Wouldn't it be nice to find *the* church that suits the whole family all of the time?
Another it isn't optional here. If our children say something about not wanting to go (which has happened) we just say that we go to church as a family. It is just something that we do. I think that it is hard because our boys have never known anything else. For a while dh worked on Sunday morning (not as a pastor) and we actually went to church on Saturday night.
I do make sure that the boys are in bed on time on Saturday night because if they miss their bedtime that is a recipe for disaster at our house. I can get them to church but there is too much whining and complaining for me to tolerate.
__________________
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Robin wife to one awesome guy for 18 years,
mama to four beautiful boys
Here it's not an option either. But we worship all the time, we're not a "be with god on sunday" family. We get up we worship together in our home temple, chant together, afternoon/evening we read from the scriptures together, evenings dh takes kids to the Temple for evening worship while I cook.
Sunday is just "another day" we go to the Temple/worship.
Sickness is the only excuse. And if that happens we just sing and worship at home
Vidura has a hard time on Sunday because a lot of people come and songs can get loud, he can't handle much in a way of sensory stimulation, but he does go, though I let him go out and run around if he gets overwhelmed. During the week it's a lot more peaceful.
We're aiming to go daily for morning (4.30am) and evening (7pm) worship in September.
__________________
We have a natural connection with every living entity. One who sees everyone connected to God does not hate anyone, he loves everyone... and that love comes to the point where you consider other's pains and pleasures more important than your pains and pleasures.
Linear Mode
