amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

DanAbimytwomira · 09-26-2004, 01:20 AM

I feel your pain, and I still have twinges of regret and sadness.

At the same time, I know that STOPPING trying to nurse my babies was the best thing I did as their mom . I had a severely low supply andwas so focused on bf and pumping and meds and lc's (even saw a DR who specializes in bf medicine, oneof onyl 50 int he U.S.) that I was not bonding with my babies. I was getting frustrated that my ds was impatient and hungry, and my dd was too tired to latch for long. I hated the pump, I hated my breasts and my body, I really hated formula and bottles. Every feeding was stressful.

When I finally gave in ater 4 months with ds and 5.5 months with dd, there was only ONE person who said it was ok: my best friend who had bf both her children for over a year. She had had major latch issues with her first child and knew how hard it is, and also the toll it was taking on me. I needed that ok to give myself permission to say "I can't do it, but my babies will be ok."

the most important thing you can do for your baby is to be her mom and meet her needs, however you are able to.

Christine

Alvenchrst · 10-22-2004, 12:41 AM

I only made it 4 months with my littleone. But it was more my fault, I just didn't get started out right. I'm still sad over it all the time and he's 13months old! My issue was that i started a paci and bottle (of ebm only when i was gone) before that ominous 6 week mark when your supposed to wait to establish the bfing relationship. I also didn't nurse on cue, a friend gave me the book babywise and i fully took in all it's terrible ideas. That book should be burned! There was a time when I swore by it, but I'm so glad to have found ap, we are so much happier now, if only it was sooner. I also would have tried to bf in a sling, but I didn't have a very good sling back then. DS eventaully would just cry when i'd nurse. I was trying to feed for equal amounts on each side and that made him really mad. Also with this switching and without enough stimulation he was frustrated with not enough milk so we gave him ebmilk till i could pump anylonger.

But I've learned soooooooooooo much and have an opposite mind set of what I did last time and the next one I plan to bf clear into toddlerhood. I hope to help other new moms too!