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Mamas with Teens and Preteens Oh dear- the eye rolling, the attitude, the whines of 'OH MOM'... hormones? just a phase? being a teen is tough- being the mama of one is tougher...

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Old 02-08-2008, 01:49 PM   #1 (permalink)
amyorama
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Teens and piercing

Last year DD pierced herself. She pierced her nose, gave herself a Marilyn Monroe and snake labraiths. (sp?) She was told to remove them and she did. Well...she's didn't let her nose ring close and wants to wear one. Honestly, I think she looks good in it, but don't want to go against my husband's wishes. He told her to let it close up, kwim?

She's 15 and her nose ring looks like the one Barb has. Very small, small diamond...cute.

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Old 02-08-2008, 02:04 PM   #2 (permalink)
irinam
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Well, your DH would hate my opinion

Her body, her choice.

But first, what is his reason for wanting her to remove it? Is there something I am not taking into account?

(BTW, she is a gorgeous young lady )
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Old 02-08-2008, 03:23 PM   #3 (permalink)
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But first, what is his reason for wanting her to remove it? Is there something I am not taking into account?
I think he thinks it looks bad on him, like he's too permissive.

Yes, Misha is a cutie, isn't she?
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Old 02-08-2008, 06:03 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amyorama View Post
I think he thinks it looks bad on him, like he's too permissive.
We-e-elll... I plead the Fifth

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Yes, Misha is a cutie, isn't she?
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Old 02-08-2008, 06:12 PM   #5 (permalink)
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For the other piercings, I do think 15 is too young to make holes that permanent. For the nose, I still would feel it's a little young, but she is showing a real determination for that one, so I would have a sit down, and talk it out, and see if we could come to an agreement about it. For Dh, maybe look up those work-safe placeholder things, which are little tubes that hold the hole open during work, and then you can replace with a proper ring after work. Then she can look more conservative for him, and for special occasions, she can wear the nose-ring, as well as keeping the hole open. Would that work?
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Old 02-08-2008, 06:12 PM   #6 (permalink)
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While i think it's important to respect her father while living under his roof, I also don't see the harm in the nose ring if it's okay with her school (assuming it's the same school mentioned in previous posts, I imagine it's okay).

I think if he's going to stand ground on an issue, there should be a valid reason for it - not just "I said so" (not that it's the case here, but just stating my personal position)

I expressed myself through all KINDS of crazy appearances my teen years and my Dad never batted an eye. Okay, maybe one - when my whole head was Windows blue. But, never said a word. I would have done more if he had

So, to save face, is there a conversation they can have - a compromise where she gets to wear a discreet nose ring?
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Old 02-08-2008, 07:34 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I would leave it where its at.

If the hole closes....it closes. If it doesn't and she still wants to wear something in it when she is older....great.

Dads get way too little respect for their stands on things.
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Old 02-08-2008, 09:56 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I'm married to a very conservative-looking (and in many ways conservative) man.....if you were to look up the word "High School Principal" in the dictionary, you'd not need a definition, just my dh's photograph. *lol*

I'm quite different and so far one of our teens is waaaaay out there. *lol* This is our oldest son and he will be 18 yrs old here in a little over a week. he has tattoos, wears eyeliner, has purple hair, and has one piercing on his lip but does have his ears pierced.

My husband was not for this at first. Neither was I to be honest. (the piercings.....I was ok with the tattoo since I have two kind of big ones)

We looked at it this way: Our son is a good kid. We know he does not drink, do drugs, or run around all night long looking for trouble. (like the jocks do) He may be "different looking" and he may have some piercings.....but this is the generation we have. Back when I was a teenager, it was "out there" to get your ears pierced a second time and for those daring teens who went up into the top of the ear??!!!! Waaaay out there! *lol*

I'd not cause trouble with your dh, but I think sitting down and talking about it is fair enough. I don't have issue with the nose being done. I actually think it is very pretty with a small stone. (I have mine done) We have one daughter who is 15 and I'd let her do it if she wanted to.

We have four teenagers. One is more like me (tattoos and piercings) The next oldest says she will get a small tattoo someday but it will be in a area that is hidden. Our next oldest girl is very conservative....not even ears pierced and she has no interest at all. The other teenager has Down syndrome and has no opinion either way. (tattoos/piercings are "normal" to him)

Not sure if any of this helped. I'd talk about it as a family. Try to find a compromise.

I'm not a fan of piercings.....other than the small nose stud. (and ears pierced once) However, as long as it is not permanent, I am more open to it. Nose piercings will stay there after a while. (the hole will not close) Lips do close up quickly. I don't know about other body parts. *lol*

Our son did get our permission for the one piercing on his lip and he did have to really convince us. He also has his ears pierced and I did not have any problem with that (neither did dh). He was told (by us) that he had to wait until age 18 to get more done. He is getting what he calls "snake bites" soon and will be letting the other one on his lip close.

I guess that is all I have to say. Oh, I'd look at how old your daughter is too.....we are strict on some things around here. (like how old they have to be to start dating one-on-one) But not everything....we talk it out and work each issue with our teenagers out. Some hard and fast rules, but only where it is a health/safety issue. Otherwise we are open and discuss things. That is how we parent.

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Last edited by Momof6 : 02-08-2008 at 09:58 PM. Reason: edited to add the ears pierced thing
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