what do you think about gently used gifts for christmas?
i should probably be asking the market board, actually, rather than my thrifty friends...lol! well...at least if you all think it's a bad idea, i'll *know* that spendier people will think it's tacky .
i was just thinking about how i'm gave ds a gift from freecycle for his b-day and will give him all used stuff except for one or two things for christmas. but then i buy everyone else's stuff and spend more $$ and make a more negative impact on the environment. i've really been focused on getting our stuff used rather than supporting the production of more and more and more stuff. so...the other day at a couple of consignment sales, i found a play coffee pot that would be perfect for a friends kids for christmas because they are a coffee family and their kids have a play kitchen and always play that they're having coffee with their tea set...lol. it has a little scratch on the clear plastic part, so i thought maybe it wasn't good enough to give for christmas and considered just giving it to them for fun. but what do you think? those girls would never ever wonder why it wasn't new, i know.
i was thinking about sending out an email to my friends/family on the christmas list and saying why i'm doing what i'm doing...mainly so that noone feels sorry for us or like we're really hurting financially or something. and also, honestly, so that i don't end up feeling embarassed at gift giving time. oh...and i would say to please feel free to give us used/homemade gifts as well.
what do you think?
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Stephanie, wife to Tim (almost 9 years) and mama to Isaac (3) and Kendall (13 months)
It would go over well in my family but I wouldn't even have to explain it (or want to actually - once you point it out it seems weird yk?).
Our extended family has actually switched to giving white elephant gifts - things from around the house/yard sales/etc. the funnier the better. Lightens the day to see everyone laughing at some funny hat from the basement.
I think I'd suggest sending out the email to explain why and just say that you'd like to receive gifts with the these themes in mind and see the reaction-some people will just plain want a new gift and you probably already know who there are.
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Natalie
mom to
DD #1: tiny terror (6/01) who's becoming a nice little girl
DD #2: peanut 3/04 who's becoming a toddler terror
Wife to Mick -13 yrs
It wouldn't work for my family. I think they'd be insulted if I gave them used things for Christmas presents. But they are the materialistic type. It might work for my dearest friend since she always happily accepts used things.
I think if you really want to do that, think of the person who would be recieving it and whether they would appreciate that or not.
I am going to reply, and please remember, I am not what people consider thrifty, lol. Not by this boards comparisons, but by real life ones, yes.
Ok, it would go over fine with MY family. If the items were barely used, or antique type ones. However dh's family would be insulted, likely discuss it behind our backs and then toss the items. It's just how they are. However they are also "thrifty" with their money, unless it's for themselves. LOL.
So in short, I'd do it if the items were, say, still wrapped and new....or if it was an antique type thing, like a great quilt or dish or etc. that I find at a flea market....and only would I give those types of things to those who appreciate them, my own family.
__________________ "Custom will reconcile people to any atrocity."
George Bernard Shaw
we do this with my parents and family...especially for kids gifts. if we find something great at consignment...but usually we buy it early and can't wait until christmas to give it..hahaha!
i know some of our friends would probably think it was great...but i have in mind a few that i think would think it odd...but maybe not so odd b/c they know you and your earnestness to take care of the earth.
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~julie~
mama to savannah, jackson and baby scarlett due in 2009! STUFF I HAVE FOR SALE
well, I read and didn't answer. Growing up, we never ever had anything new.. and now that I can afford new stuff for gifts, I tend to not even think about gently used stuff - which I'm sure makes me sound like a snob, and I'm not.
I love hand me down playdresses for my girls, and clothes in general are great, although I'm weirded out about shoes. For toys, it totally depends on what it is and the condition.. I love handmade gifts, both to send and recieve. I bought some handmade in-expensive pottery this weeked for Eric's father and mine, and I'll send that with potpourri.
I'd send out a letter, approach it as reducing your footprint on the environment and don't mention finances at all. You can make a good argument for feeling it's your responsibility to the planet without people thinking you're simply cheap or in financial trouble, kwim? Plus, if you're requesting gently used or handmade gifts for the same reason, it really won't come across that way.
Well, I don't know. LOL I don't really like the idea of used gifts, but on the other hand, it totally depends on what it is etc. Personally, I like to give consumable gifts. Things you KNOW will get used. Flylady.net or whatever has a great list. I like to give food items (think nice olive oils, wines, gourmet or special home/farmer's market made). Magazine subscriptions (they can be recycled). Tickets to events. Car care stuff for guys. Ha, one year my brother was lucky enough to get an emergency roadside kit and flashers. LOL Okay, that may have been too much. Um. Enviromentally friendly cleaning supplies. Hand soaps and lotions. For dh's graduation my aunt and uncle gave us a certificate for 4 hours of their time. That was nice, because we really need help! LOL My MIL loves antiques and those would be used I guess, but that is about it.
I use to give gently used or things that I made and it never went over well. So, now if I buy it is very inexpensive or they just don't get anything. My list is very short this year.
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"Rosa sat so Martin could walk...
Martin walked, so Obama could run...
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Shannon
Mama to a 8 year old superhero and and a baby wild child.
Location: In the Land of Golden Warmth, Surrounded by Majestic Mountains, Inspired by Desert and Ocean, Cocooned in Love
Posts: 2,943
As a child we received used toys for Christmas one year, and we didn't care.
These days I don't know what my family would think. For the most part they don't even react favorably to homemade gifts. I find it so frustrating to have been raised by them when frugality was absolutely necessary, and then to have those values mocked now.
I hate the whole $$=love thing. It is evidenced by more lavish gifts for family and 99 cent store gifts for other people. Now, I just hate cheap, made in China, 99 cent store junk. I hate knowing things will go to the landfill. I would rather spend $1 making a jar of bath salts with good salt, real essential oils, and a lovely recycled jar than give a jar of 99 cent store artifically colored and scented salts...and I know far too many people who would prefer the store bought junk.
I buy my boys used clothing. I buy used books, and used toys. They know that money goes farther when you buy things used. But I don't think I would ever give a used toy to one of my nephews. They haven't been raised that way and it wouldn't be what they wanted. For them I bargain hunt, or make gifts.
My niece is younger, and I have no problem giving her used things. I think if it is what we do now then she'll just accept it as normal. But my sister is also amenable to it, and that makes a difference. We're making her an ABC scrapbook this year for Christmas, and we have a (used) Waldorf doll to give her for her birthday.
For adults I usually give consumable gifts, homemade or storebought (okay, I prefer homemade, but not all of the people we give gifts to agree). I would easily give a used book if I knew it was perfect for someone (alas, it seems most of my family doesn't even read for pleasure).
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Peace,
Kimberly...walking my path; loving, living and learning with an amazing man and two incredible boys.
I think used items are great if you know the person would use it or that you would feel good about spending your money on it.
I've come to a point where I can buy very little and feel pretty good about it. At one point I was buying a lot of gifts out of guilt or perceived pressure. Now I don't.
If I want to share something special with someone, I share. I'm a firm believer in gifts of time, dates, memberships, foods, and donations.
Don't feel you have to explain or justify what you are doing. Just be confident in your decision and it will work out just fine.
A few good reads are:
The hundred dollar holiday (more of a booklet, but good)
We did that one year. I come from a pretty frugal New England family.
I thought it was awesome, but a couple of people didn't like it. I was *so* bummed. I picked out some really cool things and it seemed that all were happy. BUt! We made a compromise! See next paragraph.
We have a limit in place, which folks loved! Now we do Boston Red Sox Swap (what we call a Yankee swap. lol). We pick names at Thanksgiving dinner. If there are 6 in your family, you pick 6 names, if there are 2, you pick 2. It's so totally fun! We love doing it.
I told my sisters (my best friends) a loooooong time ago that we cannot waste money on gifts. They agreed, and so do our mom and dad (divorced, but their partners like it as well).
What my parents cannot get past is buying stuff for children. They do ask for lists, which helps tons on not getting carp. They are awesome at getting museum passes and other membership type items.
As for friends, we don't. We started NOPE years and years ago. No gifts for college roomies, playgroup friends, work friends, or their kids etc. We do get together several times a year, esp at the holidays with people we love, and maybe give teeny little gifts like ground coffee, homemade muffins, or a family board game--nothing beyond. We have been upfront about this and have lost no friends. People are HAPPY we're grounded.
Unplug The Christmas Machine is my fav 'cheap gifts' book, ever. Nobody enjoys the garbage. What people need to do is talk about it, and confront it! It will be OK!
.
My list is very short this year. 
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