I thought it would be great to list resolutions with our tribeswomen; our like-minded sisters and kinsfolk. A new year is upon us and I for one have little in the way of "big plans" yet much I would love to work on and improve within myself, my day-to-day work as well as my inner growth.
I will continue to look for my tribe; my people. My daily realm is empty except for the children and my outside work. I yearn for those who are open and simple. I have the idea of a knitting/crochet group once a month, a weekly work group (which is an idea I gratefully gleaned from another thread) and a women's meditation circle.
My goal is to work outside of the home less. My husband mentioned if I am lonely, perhaps I should consider my work as my social circle and I should want to be there more; not less. No, I will be friendly, courtious, respectful (etc.) to my co-workers but I have yet (in 15-plus years) found a tribeswoman in the work place.
I work in the medical field, on the floor, directly involved with hands-on patient care. A vast majority of the men/women I have worked with are die-hard professionals; with years of schooling, research and internships behind them. They do not speak of simple living or recycling. They do not speak of healing stones and moon phases. These are professionals in a scientific field. I am there to earn a wage I need in order to provide shelter for my children. I am different.
That's okay. It is fine that I have yet to find a simple spirit amoung the sterile, white and stainless world of medicine. I am there, as a "mere" nurse's aide, to provide assistance and comfort to the sick. I will do my job well, collect my pay and return home.
Home. I am a woman who creates a home for her family. I have set the goal to continue to creatively budget; reduce cost and create alternative income in order to spend more time at home and out around me, searching for my people.
This is my 40th year. I will make this a milestone year; one of intention and action.
Namaste'
__________________ Live simply, Simply in peace...
"It is no bad thing to celebrate a simple life." -Bilbo Baggins
At this time, I can only think of finishing school. Nothing else. My mind is so focused on that that there is no room for any other changes to occur in my life.
But, this time next year, I plan on making some changes. lol
Location: In the Land of Golden Warmth, Surrounded by Majestic Mountains, Inspired by Desert and Ocean, Cocooned in Love
Posts: 2,944
I'm entering into a reflective mode this week. Christmas is over, and our travel plans have pretty much been killed by illness and a bad weather forecast.
I am trying to pare down our lives to just what we need to be happy and healthy.
Our homeschooling needs to take a front seat. I will never have this time with my children again. My youngest needs fewer outside activities and more directed learning. We've dropped 2 outside activities. I want our mornings to be less hectic.
We've already taken some great steps with our diet, moving to even fewer prepared foods and a completely plant-based diet at home. Unfortunately, our food bill has risen, not gone down, due to buying more fresh fruits and veggies. So I do want to find a way to lower the grocery bill without sacrificing organics or fresh produce. I've considered a CSA, but the closest one would be about 2 hours driving in each direction. I'm weighing the benefit of that vs. gasoline and time usage. Our HFS really doesn't have bad prices; we just go through 50 pounds of fresh fruit a week.
I need more time with my "tribe" as well. Homeschool park day is my main place for meeting with my friends. I also want to get the rest of the week in focus so that we can again open our home to our friends on Friday afternoons.
As far as thrift goes, I plan to keep better track of our finances in 2006. I lump a lot of things into "miscellaneous" rather than tracking categories really well.
This was my vision statement from 2005. It really remains unchanged for 2006.
I have this vision of how I want my life to be. As a mother I want to continue to AP, to love and respect my children and to continually renew and strengthen my relationship with them. I want to homeschool them in a Waldorf manner, creating a harmonious home and a daily, weekly, and annual rhythm. I want to read voraciously to keep my mind sharp. I want to work with my hands to integrate my senses. I want to create to enjoy the beauty that comes from it. I want to be able to have great conversations with my husband and to spend quality time with him. I want to feed us healthy food, to avoid waste, and to be aware of where our food comes from. I want to simplify my home, my possessions, and my life to make room for those things (tangible and intangible) that are important to me.
I am trying to pare down our lives to just what we need to be happy and healthy.
Our homeschooling needs to take a front seat. I will never have this time with my children again.
We've already taken some great steps with our diet, moving to even fewer prepared foods.
I need more time with my "tribe" as well.
As far as thrift goes, I plan to keep better track of our finances in 2006.
All of this is the same for me.
Our life (meaning my family and I) has moved in the direction where we want it to over the past four months. I want to foster this move and continue our growth. Less time on the computer, more time outside, more time sharing and talking with others, walking, exploring nature. I've begun a wonderful volunteer position that fits me perfectly and it's also a time where I can just be "jenni" without being mom. While to some that may seem ridiculous, it's not something I do enough of. The job is providing me with a way to unwind, to relax and a time without interference. It's made my time with my kids more focused. I'm happy.
Our budget is pared down and will be down another $100 this week. We're trying to save to buy a house when we move this year. We eat very little meat now and we're trying to grow many of our veggies. We've really focused on needs vs. wants and our spending has been reduced quite a bit.
There will be no resolutions from me, just a desire to continue on the path I'm on.
__________________
They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.
Andy Warhol
I've been thinking about this for several weeks now. I am focusing at home. . . to make our home a nurturing and nurtured place. This year we have no big changes in sight. And I feel like I can finally take a breather. This is really hard for me. I am not comfortable with "being comfortable." I like something to look forward to, something that rocks the boat a little, to keep me on my toes.
There is something I have been thinking about lately that is in complete opposition to my goal above. I have been thinking about moving to the city from the country. It's for my dh. He has a 45 minute commute right now each way, sometimes longer. I feel that we could be closer as a family, have a more relaxed family life if we cut his commute, saved the gas money and wear and tear on the car, and were able to see him during the day for lunch once in a while. It's hard on him and it's hard on me to have him so far away. Sigh. He is against it, of course. He wouldn't want to move again. We moved to the country so we could have a good sized yard, bigger house. It doesn't feel that it has been worth it though.
Sigh. So that's where I am welcoming in 2006. Really, the crux of it I am trying to hone in on living our lives in line with our values. Focusing on home and family. Not fine tuning, just trying to get the antenna in the right direction for some reception, kwim? So far we've been just following along with what everyone else seems to want/be doing. Not looking into our hearts. Simplifying has always been a goal. But now I am looking at it in the context of our value system rather than taking things for granted like "country is better." Maybe not.
__________________
I respect your opinion as an educated and intelligent adult and I hope you will do the same for me.
I am not one for "New Year's Resolutions" as I prefer to make changes as I see the need, throughtout the year. But we are just getting settled into a new-to-us house, and I really need to make some changes.
Get back to from-scratch food. Especially making our own bread again.
Work on making our house a home. Right now it is just the place where we live -- not a home that is welcoming to family and guests. I want it to be free of clutter, and feel good.
I need to work on maintaining balance in my family/personal life. For awhile it has been that my needs take a back seat to the children's needs. It is time that my self and my marriage start getting a little more attention.
I have this vision of how I want my life to be. As a mother I want to continue to AP, to love and respect my children and to continually renew and strengthen my relationship with them. I want to homeschool them in a Waldorf manner, creating a harmonious home and a daily, weekly, and annual rhythm. I want to read voraciously to keep my mind sharp. I want to work with my hands to integrate my senses. I want to create to enjoy the beauty that comes from it. I want to be able to have great conversations with my husband and to spend quality time with him. I want to feed us healthy food, to avoid waste, and to be aware of where our food comes from. I want to simplify my home, my possessions, and my life to make room for those things (tangible and intangible) that are important to me.
Kimberly
This is lovely, and sums up a lot of how I feel. We are not homeschooling, but I still want to create a harmonious home full of rhythm and ritual. We did some Advent rituals this year for the first time, and it felt really good, right to me. The kids loved it, and my two year old asked last night if we could light the candles again and sing before we ate dinner. I will be looking for other kinds of things we can incorporate into our days and months.
We have strayed from good, whole food, mostly because we were doing some elimination for suspected, but not confirmed food sensitivities, and allowed junk in order to appease ugly withdrawal demons. We have just had some testing done with Great Lakes and should be receiving the results in the next couple weeks. I want to get us back on track with whole, from scratch foods (with results in mind).
I want to create balance in myself and in my children. Our home seems so often to be in upheaval, both physically and emotionally, and we need to find a way to help our kids, particularly our oldest, to find balance and peace. FlyLady seems to work for me in a general fashion, and my house is in more control, physically speaking, but there is still lots of room for decluttering, organization, and general routine.
I need to make more time for myself for exercise and recharging (see above).
I need to take control of our finances. We get by and we don't splurge a whole lot, but we don't want for much either. Then again, we aren't getting anywhere with regard to debt, really, either, so that needs to change.
I want to fret less about what doesn't get done--the most important thing I can be doing is spending time with my kids. They are growing too fast.
Thanks for this thread and your inspirational posts!
__________________ Jody
Mama to two boys (5-10-98 and 6-01-01), and two girls (11-18-03 and 1-11-07)
Location: When I dare to be powerful -- to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.
Posts: 9,502
I would like to bring my resolutions over here, because they are more simple than crunchy. And I would also like to do a check up on how my friends are doing with their resolutions and post how I am doing with mine.
My resolve may seem petty if I write them down, but I will give it a try.
I vow to be more sexy. I like the way it feels and it makes me a stronger person inside. I like feeling that way. There for I am putting a bit more effort into it. (Yep... been doing this. Got a few new pairs of pants, made myself some clothes, and worn sexy undies a lot lately.)
I vow to learn to play one video game on my dh's new toy. If we are going to spend $600 on anything, I would like to know what it does, and at least have put a bit of effort into getting to know the obsession. (tried, but the damed thing broke so we sent it back in and haven't gotten it back yet. Kameo is a cool game and Don the kids and I can all play it. So when the Xbox gets back I will get back on it)
I vow to go to an actual Yoga class once a week. This should be easy. I usually do. Resolutions like this are the ones that make me feel like I am not failing. (Done it every week)
I vow to plant a garden and enjoy it. This is something I couldn't do last year cuz we moved in the middle of planting season. It was a hole in my being... must fix that. (Been planning, a lot... got all my books out and wrote out a garden plan. Even went out and marked where the garden stopped and where we needed to dig)
Get outside more. That is a great one. And probobly the only one on this list I will fail at. LOL! (half and half. Have been getting outside more that Dec... but does that really count? I don't think I went outside in Dec.)
ETA: Eat out less. We don't do it often normally, but since we have had an inflow of cash, it has been so easy! I hate hate hate it... espically when I think that the money we spent to eat in the airport today would have bought a whole season of Little House on the Prairie and we didn't even like the food... well the thought just made me sick. So that is my new one. No eating out! Which means, more planning, a bit more snacky food from the grocery, and a bit more will power. (Been doing much better these last two weeks since I mentioned to dh that he was spending his tv fund by eating out. That stopped him cold. We have eaten out once (maybe once more at Taco Bell in the very begining of Jan) and tonight we are eating Pizza after our workouts with my yoga instructor.)
Savings! I will put money in savings and not use it at one point in the next two months. Our tax return is coming, we just got part of the inheritance (which we are using to pay off CC's racked up this year for necessary and completely unnecessary things too), and we are getting the rest with in two months. Some of this is going away. (Half and half again. We put money in there, but then had to take $200 out because we didn't get a payment on the car on the date the guy said we would, and I bought fabric the day before. That'll teach me.)
Make a list of all debts and start plugging away at one. My cc is the highest intrest, so that should go first. Even if we pay Mins on the rest of the debt (including the loan from my dad) it will be able to get higher and higher with each little thing with high intrest we tick off. Dad will understand and all it takes is will power. We have done great not putting lots on credit, now it is time to take the stuff we have put on there little by little off. (Can't do this quite yet. But soon.)
So basically I vow to make more lists, have higher willpower, and take charge of my life now that we finally can.
I had one more unwritten resolution as well. At the end of Dec we were having a VERY hard time with Alex. And Cyan was starting to get belligerant as well. Don and I had a long conversation and we made a game plan dealing with the kids. I put that into my resolutions in my head to continue helping them be politer and kinder people by showing them that we don't have to get angry when they are not polite and kind. It can be a frustration and not meet fury with fury. So far this year we have eaten at the table every night but one, we have been talking about manners, and we have been doing a good job of not going off the deep end when they are being jerks. This to me, feels like a sucess.
__________________
Val; Living the dream we have been working towards for over 5 years.
Mama to Alex, Cyan, and Logan. Wife to my very best friend.
Location: In the Land of Golden Warmth, Surrounded by Majestic Mountains, Inspired by Desert and Ocean, Cocooned in Love
Posts: 2,944
Here's my update:
I am trying to pare down our lives to just what we need to be happy and healthy. We took a trunk load of clothing and household goods to the Goodwill, and I have started another pile.
My youngest needs fewer outside activities and more directed learning. We've dropped 2 outside activities. I want our mornings to be less hectic. We're making strides. I found that with fewer outside activities we can be more flexible about schooling when the boys are in the mood.
I do want to find a way to lower the grocery bill without sacrificing organics or fresh produce. I've considered a CSA, but the closest one would be about 2 hours driving in each direction. I'm weighing the benefit of that vs. gasoline and time usage. Our HFS really doesn't have bad prices; we just go through 50 pounds of fresh fruit a week. I'm still undecided about the CSA. I'm putting out the word to see if anyone else I know wants to do it and take turns doing the driving.
I need more time with my "tribe" as well. Homeschool park day is my main place for meeting with my friends. I also want to get the rest of the week in focus so that we can again open our home to our friends on Friday afternoons. Park day has started up again. I probably won't be able to start up our Friday visits until late February.
As far as thrift goes, I plan to keep better track of our finances in 2006. I lump a lot of things into "miscellaneous" rather than tracking categories really well. I am doing great with this one, but it does take several hours weekly to enter and track everything.
Let's see. I've lost 3.5 pounds so far in January (was 5.5 but I gained 2 pounds back over our camping weekend...birthday cake). I've exercised 5-6 days a week. The boys and I are doing a lot of walking, which saves gas, gets us exercise, and exposes us to natural light. We're also spending lots of time together as a family. So far this year is going really well.
I am focusing at home. . . to make our home a nurturing and nurtured place.
I have done a lot of brooding about it why I am avoidant of this with no resolution but have realized that for the sake of my children I need to do this. I have the can't have anyone over syndrome and it doesn't mix well with homeschooling. My oldest needs playmates. I have gotten back to some flylady routines and my family and home have seen improvement. I have managed to schedule playdates every week for the kids and they are very happy.
I am not comfortable with "being comfortable."
I have realized that our supposed comfort was an illusion. I have a goal of being comfortable now, in the true sense of the word. Knowing that you have taken care of the things you have control over and let go of the rest.
There is something I have been thinking about lately that is in complete opposition to my goal above. I have been thinking about moving to the city from the country.
We have looked into this. See below.
Really, the crux of it I am trying to hone in on living our lives in line with our values. Focusing on home and family. Not fine tuning, just trying to get the antenna in the right direction for some reception, kwim?
The biggest thing we've done so far this year is take a good hard look at our financial health and we are not measuring well. We are making some difficult choices right now which include selling the house and buying a considerably more modest home. PRIDE is a big obstacle. But the truth is that what we have is an illusion, it is borrowed only, it is not ours, and it is borrowed on our children's future and our future.
The other big issue for me was religion and raising my children in a faith. After lengthy talks with dh and lots of introspection I have abandoned religion. I can't raise them in a faith without the support of their father and he has no faith. It is a big loss for me but the truth is, and very difficult to face as well, that I cannot immerse myself in a faith that I don't feel strongly about and I have lots of doubts about any organized religion. I told my dh, "I don't believe any of it." To which he said, "maybet that's why you can't chose a church." I am sort of stuck in the loss part right now, and denial, still thinking I can go to this or that church and it'll work out.
So overall I can say we are definitely in the thick of things right now. I am not feeling very hopeful and dh in true form is dragging his feet and avoiding decision making Sigh. I hope to have more uplifting new next time we update.
Last edited by waterlily : 01-18-2006 at 10:01 AM.
My goal is to work outside of the home less. Next week, I will begin my new, part-time schedule. I need to stay focused and use this time wisely...not snoozing on the couch or reading or (gasp) playing on the computer!
Home. I am a woman who creates a home for her family. I have set the goal to continue to creatively budget; reduce cost and create alternative income in order to spend more time at home and out around me, searching for my people. I have been fighting a looming depression this month...I need to hold on to the love I have for this place, the sense of place I have for my home.
This is my 40th year. I will make this a milestone year; one of intention and action. I am not loving forty so far...I need to...
Here's to the new year.
Jody
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