So, dh and I were talking last night...

[3Gs4Me]

for the first time in what seems like weeks. This stupid issue with our original contractor, staying at my mom's, and dh driving an hour one way to work has really kept us apart in many ways. I think of so many things during the day in regards to our lives, amibitions, etc... that I want to discuss with him and then I realize that 2-3 days have passed and I still have not had the time to discuss it with him

It has really made me realize how important simplifying is for ones marriage. Not that our relationship is bad at all but there are just to many things coming between us that are keeping us from being as close as we should be. This is another reason that I can't wait to get back on track and be in our home so that I can simply cuddle on the couch with my dh and talk about our hopes and dreams again.

I also wanted to add that one of the first steps we are taking when we get moved in is to have the boys go to bed at 8:30 instead of 9-9:30 and then we will let them read for a bit. This will give us some extra talk time since usually we are ready to drop by the time we get them all to bed.

Anyone else feel like they are pulled in so many directions that it effects your relationship one way or another?

[Kbsmama]

I see this happening. So many times, we go days without really talking to each other. In the last few months, DH has been putting the boys to bed (that way DS #2 does not nurse to sleep) while I put DD to bed in the other room. Generally, he falls asleep with them and then wakes up after I am asleep and climbs into bed with us. Pretty sad.

Some part of me really wants to have another baby. There isn't even time to discuss it. It is most likely unrealistic. I remember thinking when Molly was born that another baby might ruin our marriage. Since then, we have grown a lot, and I believe our marriage is stronger, but so often we are so stretched that we barely connect.

On those rare occasions, though, when we get out and actually get to have an adult conversation, it is wonderful, and I feel good for quite awhile because I often discover that we're closer to the same page than I thought we might be at the moment...For some reason, I'm always suprised to find out he actually believes in what I am doing; perhaps because when we don't get a lot of time to discuss things, we only manage to discuss the urgent concerns and never get around to the, "You're doing a good job" part. You know?

Anyway, I can totally relate. We have started doing our bedtime routines at about 7:30 so people are actually asleep by 8:30. It doesn't always work with our 2 year-old, but every now and then we get a break!

[juliebelle]

yes..i have felt like that from time to time. dh just started his own business and before he quit his 'day job'...he was working both! it all happened right around the time jackson was born.

we decided no matter what it costs..we are going on a date night every week. for us...that was the best solution and it has really paid off! twice we have come home and BOTH the kids were asleep!