amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

Willow · 02-28-2006, 08:47 PM

Hello everyone,

I've been taking a multiples class and talking with doctors for a couple of months now, and I realize that I really could use some help in the delivery room fighting off all those liability-minded staff and doctors who want me pumped full of pitocin, an epidural in my back, an internal monitor in Baby A, and me trapped in bed.

Sorry for ranting, but it's really beginning to depress me.

Anyway, I think hiring a doula or midwife to be my labor attendant and advocate might help a LOT in keeping all the doctors and nurses at bay. Did anyone use a doula or midwife in a hospital alongside an OB, and did it help you get the birth experience you wanted? I'd love to hear your stories! Thanks so much.

Maura · 03-01-2006, 12:14 AM

I did. I was overseas and my husband was in Iraq, so I wanted someone in with me. I had my older dd at a friend's house. I was high risk and induced, so I really wanted someone there who would speak up for me if I started to feel bullied. I got what I wanted, and after my first delivery of 43 hours I got a much shorter labor (12 hours) and felt much better about that labor. She spoke up when I was really feeling the contactions and couldn't focus on what the doctors were saying. I was so glad I had hired her to go through the labor with me.

Kerrilynn62000 · 03-01-2006, 02:32 AM

I think I already sent you my birth story, plan & questionairre.

I had the OB and then a resident (they were no real "help" for the labour process at all). My true helpers were my DH (remember this was baby #5 & 6 for him too & he has a pretty good idea of what he is doing!). Mid-wives jokingly offered him a job! Also I had two mid-wives who were my "labour attendants". They also did ALL the after care for the babies as they never left the room (I managed to refuse the OR & got to stay in one of the birthing rooms.) I AM SO GLAD I had my DH & the mid-wives. They were there to stand up for & support me when the OB was pushing for an epidural when there was no medical reason for it (well other than OB's if/then scare tactics of what would/could happen & none of those things did happen that would have made the epi necessary)

Gotta go, someone is awake & calling for me!!

juliebelle · 03-01-2006, 07:21 AM

i think hiring a doula would be great! my mom has been doula in a couple of twin births. i think it made all the difference for their births.

i personally think everyone needs a "doula" at their birth...whether that person is a mom, a sister or whatever...

danica · 03-01-2006, 08:13 AM

i had a midwife and she was wonderful.

i dilated fully without any interventions, not even an iv. but my babies were in a very odd presentation (transverse oblique, transverse oblique, with baby a's neck presenting) at 34 weeks.

i was offered the option of external version but i'm a baaaaaaaaad mommy so i opted for the c-section instead. i know i could have tried but i had a feeling the surgical birth was the best choice given all the variables. (ftr, baby a had some issues that i think would not have made version a good thing but we didn't know about those until after they were out). the midwife stayed with me the whole time, stroking my hair and giving me a play by play. it was really nice having someone there who knew what was going on but was focused on me. it was also nice having someone there who felt that ~rarely~ c sections are good. she made me feel better about the whole situation. the operating room was full of people, and i do mean FULL--but the two people i remember making the surgery itself a pleasant emotional experiece were the anesthesioligist and the midwife. (which enabled dh to watch the surgery and then help with the babies). things did get a little nutty because as baby a's feet were being pulled out baby b's head was coming up. they were interlocked head to feet in a yingyang fashion and ended with the same birth time. that's not supposed to happen, lol!

it was an odd, yet wonderful birth. and yes, having the midwife there was definitely helpful even though i didn't end up not suceeding at natural birth with them.

Willow · 03-02-2006, 05:53 PM

Thank you, everyone, for your input! My husband and I have decided that we definitely want to have a doula, and interviewed one today. We've also decided to switch practices and hospitals! The one we hated we chose solely because it has the most extensive NICU in the area, for the worst case scenario... but the doula we interviewed gave us valuable information about how the local hospitals interact, and it turns out that we don't need to necessarily birth at the NICU hospital, for a variety of reasons... And the midwife practice we're switching to is just terrific, and with a doula as well, I feel SO much more comfortable about my situation. What a relief! So thank you again, everyone!

MaMa~Oz · 03-10-2006, 01:23 AM

coming in late on this.. I had my girls in the hosp unmed VBAC. it was a good experience. That being said I think there is alot of room for doula's that attend multiple births. This is the reason I am taking a doula workshop and working on getting certified through DONA. would like to be a doula and specialize in multiples, and PP care for moms of multiples.

Willow · 03-10-2006, 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaMa~Oz

I think there is alot of room for doula's that attend multiple births. This is the reason I am taking a doula workshop and working on getting certified through DONA. would like to be a doula and specialize in multiples, and PP care for moms of multiples.

I am so glad there are doulas willing to specialize in multiples! Because I'm so darn old (36) and pregnant with twins, most OBs and hospitals seem to think I'm going to fall apart at the seams at any moment. I managed to find ONE midwifery practice that will take me, despite my "condition"

, and I'm so relieved to be around people who don't think I'm a bundle of potential pathological conditions. Their hospital is also very forward-thinking (or maybe old fashioned, I'm not sure) about labor and birth, but if I were attending ANY of the other 3 hospitals in my area, I would absolutely want a doula with me. I just wish I had one for my first (singleton) birth!

MaMa~Oz · 03-10-2006, 03:38 PM

I had my girls on my 33rd birthday. I am glad I had a great nurse and a doc who was on board with what I wanted. I hope your birth is all you want.

momto4little1s · 03-18-2006, 09:15 PM

Doula Here,

Excellent choice. I, as well as, other doulas work with Obs too. Don't think Doula means you "have" to use a midwife.

I also think everyone needs a doula. I believe we draw strength from other women during our births.

Congrats!!!

Traci