amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

singlemomto3 · 02-20-2006, 02:39 PM

I want to get him so he never does it again, but not go overboard. I am thinking about calling the store and getting them to talk to him, maybe call the police if thats their protocal. My friend thinks he should have a bad day today too.

We were shopping last week sometime, and he took a pair of cheeta sunglasses from sears. I just found out today when he tattled on a kid for throwing rocks at houses to the kids dad, then the kid came here to tell me on braiden about the sunglasses. We can't find the sunglasses, so it makes it harder. Any ideas will help. Thanks

tara · 02-20-2006, 02:47 PM

If it were my son, I would have a stern talk with him about why stealing is wrong (and illegal). Then, I would take him back to Sears, to the department where he stole the glasses, and have him explain to the department manager what he did. Then, I'd ask the department manager how much the glasses cost, and repay the store. The money would come from the child's piggy bank, and if there isn't enough in there, then the child would do extra chores to repay me for the full amount. Stealing is a lot like lying in my book--both times you take something from someone, and it would be a huge offense in our family.

Tara

Bluemoonjo · 02-20-2006, 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by singlemomto3

I just found out today when he tattled on a kid for throwing rocks at houses to the kids dad, then the kid came here to tell me on braiden about the sunglasses. We can't find the sunglasses, so it makes it harder. Any ideas will help. Thanks

I don't think I would do anything, unless I had the sunglasses in hand.
The other kid might just be mad because he got in trouble, and wants your ds to get in trouble to.

Unless your ds admitted he did take them .......

How where 6 year olds throwing rocks at houses ???

amyorama · 02-20-2006, 03:59 PM

If he even did take the glassees, take him back to the store with them, so he can return them and apologize to the manager. I had to do this with my DD several times; she stole gum, a bracelet, some candy...I think she cared to have whatever she wanted more. She's now 13 and hasn't stolen anything (that I know of) since she was 7.

ThirtySomething · 02-20-2006, 04:07 PM

IMO there is not enough information here. There are no glasses and an angry 6 yr old.

I'd ask open questions:

X said that you stole some glasses from Sears.
Where will I find them? We need to take them back.

I'm afraid that if you accuse him, (IE: Did you steal the glasses?) he will deny it and then be put in a position where he has lied to you if he actually has done this.

Now, if you ask him open questions in a non-judgmental way and then punish him in an angry way, he will get the idea that he should not tell you things. So, tread gently. The goal is to return the glasses OR make him pay for them. I don't think he needs to be treated like a criminal unless there are other reasons to believe he has a chronic problem.

In most cases, a child learns from his mistake simply by correcting it. A chronic problem is a sign or more underlying problems not simply a bad decision.