amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

Tomcat5251 · 05-09-2005, 09:09 PM

I'm *VERY* close to loosing my marbles with Frasier. He's been limit testing a gazillion times daily. He will not stop when I tell him "no". If I try to re-direct him, he goes right back to what he was doing. He's been hitting, kicking and throwing things. He does not listen. When I'm serious with him, he laughs at me. I put him in time out, he laughs at me. I take away the toy(s) that were thrown, he laughs. Nothing is working with this child. I've even tried an occasional spank, once in a blue moon (firm swat on the bottom). He laughs at me. But, when his Dad steps in and disciplines him, he listens. I have to call in his Dad if I want results. Someone please advise me before they have to put me in the "going nuts-be back in a while" category.

tinyterror'sma · 05-09-2005, 09:36 PM

Sounds like he's trying to get your attention & then turning troublemaking into a game. What is he doing anyway? Are you being too strict?

If you aren't, pick the major issues that you absolutely feel that you must "discipline" & let all the little annoyances slide. Concentrate on positive itneractations & praising him for anything positive. Give him little bouts of as much positive 1 on 1 time as you can - 10 minutes mult. times a day. Continue to let the little things slide.

Now, if a major issue happens, use whatever consequence you've decided on (with his input when he's old enough) & STICK TO IT. If he laughs, that's ok as long as the consequence occurs. Pick a consequence that he'll care about (no toy, no TV, no special snack, etc). DO NOT call Daddy - he has to know that you're serious & that actions have immediate consequences.

Good luck & remember that 3 (almost) is still very little.

Tomcat5251 · 05-09-2005, 10:14 PM

[quote=tinyterror'sma] What is he doing anyway? QUOTE]

He's taken to hitting and kicking me and throwing toys when I tell him it's time to clean up or a bath, etc. Or, if I tell him, no snack 10 minutes before dinner-he hits me. He really pummeled me the other day when I was burning dinner and had a grease fire going and he wanted his pee pants changed NOW.

Erica · 05-09-2005, 10:21 PM

Okay first off you can't tell him to hit you, if you've hit him as a form of discipline. I mean that with love, not judgment. Three is a really hard age. He's probably, like Cody, exercising his new personhood and trying to see how far he can go. Make sure he gets lots of fresh air and outdoor play to blow off that steam. Keep a routine.

I could get more specific but you'd have to give a scenario!