amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

tikva18 · 11-29-2004, 01:17 AM

I need suggestions desperately. When I put him to bed at night he just gets right back out again. I've been reminding him that the rule is: stay in bed. I repeat it. He repeats: the rule is: go in the closet, go eat cheese, the rule is: get out of bed.

He's done it...I'm slowly going nuts. He's such an imp. He looks up at me the same way his biggest brother used to - and then laughs. AAARGHHH!

Obviously spanking is not the answer. So what do I do? I keep going back and putting him back in, reminding him to stay in bed. I've tried a reward in the morning - which he truly does want, but it's not helping. It doesn't help that the next brother is in the upper bunk egging him on. When he thinks that I can't hear him, he tells Rashi to "get out of bed! get out of bed!"

Mamas, please. Lay your staying -in -bed solutions on me. I am eagerly awaiting your advice with bated breath.

pj and the bear · 11-29-2004, 01:50 AM

Get a book and sit at the top of the stairs. I've done it here when the "natives" were restless. Otherwise, separate them into different rooms - including yours in a sleeping bag and move him once he's asleep - sit at the top of the stairs, then read your book. Scrapbooking is also a good activity.

HTH but probably not!!

FWIW, my 2 1/2 y/o doesn't always stay in bed (and even puts himself to bed after he's been up for awhile). It usually depends on when he's napped. If it's after 3PM I don't even bother putting him to sleep before 9PM.

Rach · 12-01-2004, 09:55 PM

We have sleep rules and the kids take a stone to bed for each rule. So, each time they don't follow a rule, we take a stone. With DS, we had a surprise for every morning he had all three stones. For DD, the idea of losing a stone was enough to keep her in bed. We used stones because they had no inherent value like a book, doll, or other lovey. It works for us, and we only use it when "the natives get restless". In your case, I'd give each boy the stones, and take them from the one who is egging the younger one on.

Good luck! Sleep stuff really is my personal hot button, and this was a way to diffuse the situation in our house.

Oh! just in case, our sleep rules are-
1. Stay in bed.
2. Stay very quiet.
3. Go to sleep.

tikva18 · 12-01-2004, 10:49 PM

Okay, tonight actually went all right. I had a massage today so i was prepared for this evening

. Ds #2 who eggs on DS#3 was taking a late bath. I put DS#3 in bed and told him to stay in bed. I sat with him a little bit, but he wouldn't settle down, sooo, I told him that I would have to close his door. He was not to happy with me, let me tell you. He cried out: Mommy I need you...at which point I wanted to cry too. Knowing that this was truly for his good, I remained on the other side of the door. Poor little boy. A couple of times he got up and ran to the door and opened it. I calmly returned him to his bed and gave him a kiss and a hug. The next time he tried to open the closet. I returned him to his bed with a hug and kiss. In the end he cried for a few minutes and was sound asleep. Hopefully, each night will be better than the previous. May we all be blessed with sleeping children at the right hour.

DanAbimytwomira · 12-05-2004, 05:23 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by tikva18
May we all be blessed with sleeping children at the right hour.

Absolutely

I like the stone idea or something like it for both boys.
And I think what you did was fine, you were right there and gentle and it's not like he's 6 months old. What I've found is that when a nehavior gets out of hand I need to be strict about it (gentle consequences, but firm and no second chances after the first offense and a warning) or it will take forever to deal with.

Hope you get more sleep tonight.