Cathy,
I just wanted to take a sec to say that I apriciate your explanation of Baby Whisperer. My SIL is more of a 'chewy' type and at times we have had a strained relationship because of rigidity on both our parts. Hearing your explanation really put her view in perspective for me. I think it's great that you've found a way for yourself.
~joli~
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formerly known as sagemama
Sage Emma 10-21-99
Torin Rory 05-05-02
Rhys Maryn 11-15-04
MacEwan Arthur 05-23-2007
Location: A revolution is required now. Not a worldly revolution, today the need is of a spiritual revolution. ~Amma (Mata Amritanandamayi Devi)
Posts: 13,912
Only 10???
I have to agree with many that have already been mentioned. But here are mine in random order:
Baby Book for general purposes
The Continuum Concept
Our Babies, Ourselves (an amazing book)
Parent Effectiveness Training or PET (don't let the title turn you off, it's awesome)
Everyday Blessings
Womanly Art of Breastfeeding
Natural Child
Nonviolent Communication
The Family Bed
Raising a Daughter
Raising Your Spirited Child
Punished by Rewards (an amazing concept, addresses education too)
Some I haven't read but want to:
No-cry Sleep Solution
When the Sun Comes Up
You Are Your Child's First Teacher
Siblings Without Rivalry
Oh, Amy! I forgot all about Our Babies Ourselves!! That book changed my life when I read it, and it's never on my bookshelf, because it's always on loan to someone who's pregnant
Continuum Concept too... wonderfull!
I should just let this go, because there are some wonderful book ideas on this list and i think that i'm only contributing negative energy here and i'm not getting any kind of validation. But i'm not sure where else to put this so it goes here.
For the record i did read hogg's book and as a sleep deprived new mama her writings really skewed my view of the way that things were supposed to be. I was ready to bang my head against the wall because my perfect child did not conform to what this "expert" thought should be happening. I was contstantly second guessing myself and always thought that i was doing something wrong because my child did not eat then play then sleep. There were many things that happened in my child's early infancy that i still feel that i need to heal from now. I still feel horrendous guilt that it was the things i was doing that caused his terrible colic. I've always been opposed to cio and when my child screamed and cried all the time regardless of anything i tried to do for him and when the "expert" (hogg) that i was referring to said that i was doing everything wrong by letting him eat then sleep then eat then whatever, can you see the kind of internal conflict i experienced??? And i still say puke to hogg because whenever i think about that all i want to do is throw up because of the immense sorrow and guilt that i have.
It wasnt until my child was about 6 mos old that we got internet and i got online and realized that the way that i felt comfortable parenting even had a name or that other pple did it. I'd never heard of sears or attachment parenting until then, although i had read an article in a mainstream mag that talked about in-arms parenting that rang true to me and i had in-arms parented my child as much as possible. A sling would have made life so much easier in those early days. We had a snuggly but as anyone who's ever used one of those horrible things knows it is impossible to breastfeed in one of those things.
Anyways, like i said i still have a lot of healing to do.
I am sorry that for *you* the book was not helpful. I am sorry for your feelings of guilt and pain and how unhappy you feel to see the name even mentioned. We are parents and parents are human and we make mistakes. I have made mistakes, and I have had to let go of the pain so that I can be a good mother *today* and not go over the how I made choices in the past that today don't seem right.
I have to mother myself, and forgive myself so that I can mother my daughter and teach her to forgive.
We have two different views on the same book and both are valid. I think we can agree to hold the different views and understand that the views have been heard and validated.
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