Anyway, the agency I'm talking about is just the one requiring a statement of faith..I don't know about others because I only looked at that one..I was so darned impressed that once you went through the process you could get your baby so quickly. They also handle foreign adoptions. The agency I looked at was www.opendooradoption.com
Oh man, this agency just put my friends through the wringer. They had to jump through all sorts of hoops and in the end they didn't get the baby (Downs Syndrome newborn boy).
FWIW, if you are looking for an AA infant, usually the wait is pretty short. We would have been 3 months from SIGN UP to PLACEMENT if our first adoption didn't fall through. So don't rely on those statistics to lead you to an agency.
Another thing, before going with an agency, ask DISRUPTION statistics. The way an agency deals with birthmothers greatly affects the disrupt rate. I also forgot to mention that you should expect a disruption (adoption falling through). Nobody likes to think it will happen to them, but it happens a lot unfortunately. Just be mentally prepared that if you are going to "match" with a pregnant potential birthmom, there are no guarantees. I had no idea how often it happens and was shook to the core when it happened twice. Being more involved in the adoption world now, I see it happens all the time. Other people match and get their babies the first time around. I guess it's a little like miscarriage.
Thanks for all the info so far. I've always felt called to adoption, and we plan to round out our family that way. It's gonna have to wait until we're back on the Mainland though.
Well I found the USKids website but when I called our social worker today for a homestudy update she told me that I do have to become a licensed foster parent to adopt through family services and that most states won't place with us until after we have our baby.
Location: Sometimes things look bad, then, poof, the moment is gone. And what do we do? We just keep swimming on.
Posts: 39,498
Ours was the same way, Adria. Many won't place until after a baby is born (and not while pregnant at all).
And part of the process is being licensed as a foster parent - it doesn't mean you have to BE one, just that you're able to be one. I think it's so that if a child needs to be relenquished after birth (or in an emergency situation) they'd rather place the baby/child with a person who is licensed to care for them IMMEDIATELY *then* go through the adoption paperwork and formalities. It's just easier on the child - since very few children through family services are open for adoption *immediately*.
Well I found the USKids website but when I called our social worker today for a homestudy update she told me that I do have to become a licensed foster parent to adopt through family services and that most states won't place with us until after we have our baby.
Here (and I'm pretty sure everywhere) you have to go through all the training etc. to do EITHER. We did 30 hours of training a couple of years ago to be able to foster. Now we are going the adoption route thru the state so the classes count for that (they are for either). They tend to be really discouraging to you when you call and ask questions (not sure why...). They'll say they have no babies available, etc. and it's just not true. We've missed out on two babies by not being *quite* approved. One was a boy straight from the hospital and the other was 5 months. This is just in the last few months.
The MAJORITY of foster kids won't be on any website. In our state, about 1/5 of the kids are on the website, and usually they are the harder to place kids (the other ones go quicker obviously so they never get on the site).
If you go to fosterparents.com there is a heading at the top that says STATES and it'll give you the direct website for each state. I know our state usually is not on USkids, so not all states are there, kwim?
It may be true they may not place with you until after you have the baby, but it would probably take that long to get approved. You would need training and then the homestudy. Unless your state is pretty quick.
I didn't see this thread before! I'm ready to start figuring out what I need to do for a homestudy. Our "plan" is to start with foster care--we have one bedroom, maybe 2 available RIGHT NOW. I'm anxious to get going.
I didn't see this thread before! I'm ready to start figuring out what I need to do for a homestudy. Our "plan" is to start with foster care--we have one bedroom, maybe 2 available RIGHT NOW. I'm anxious to get going.
We used LDS Adoption Services and while, to be honest, I think they are a joke, we stuck with them because they were so cheap. And we received these children that were all meant to be ours. But yuck. I think I know more about adoption than our social workers do. I know I'm much more organized than them, anyway. And they are pretty backwards in some of their beliefs about openness, etc. But it all depends on where you are. In Canada, we had the first wide-open adoptions they'd ever handled and now we do workshops for them on it and they're offering it as an option to all families now.
Kerri
__________________
Mama to Cole (8), Naomi (7), Adam (7), and Noah (4)
All adopted - All breastfed
Wife to my darling David for over 11 years
Breastfeeding Counsellor and Doula
Waiting to hear back about my midwifery school application.
UPDATE 1/Oct/2009: I Got In. Holy Crap. I Guess We Are Working On Moving To New Zealand In January 2009!
We used LDS Adoption Services and while, to be honest, I think they are a joke, we stuck with them because they were so cheap. And we received these children that were all meant to be ours. But yuck. I think I know more about adoption than our social workers do. I know I'm much more organized than them, anyway. And they are pretty backwards in some of their beliefs about openness, etc. But it all depends on where you are. In Canada, we had the first wide-open adoptions they'd ever handled and now we do workshops for them on it and they're offering it as an option to all families now.
Kerri
That is awesome you've been instumental in helping them offer more open adoptions! I am ALLLL for open adoptions!
Well my adoption journey has really been a roller coaster.
First we adopted DD from Guatemala 4 years ago when she was 8 mo old. What a blessing she's been. So we wanted to adopt again.
#1 matched with mom in AZ, she chnges her mind 1 month before birth
#2 matched with mom in GA, she changes mind after baby born
#3 matched with mom in CA, we fly out, I'm with her for L/D, cut cord, she cahnges mind 6 hours later.
#4 referral for 6 year old girl in Guatemala, fly down to see her, come home, agency calls says we can't have her because of new information, she's been mostested and is considered a danger to our DD.
#5 referred to infant boy (Jose) in Guatemala fly down to see him in Oct. 2004, told he'd be home by Christmas, February 2005, still waiting, can't find birthmom to sign off adoption. Adoption process stops.
#6 referred to newborn girl in May 2005 ---still waiting for her to come home
#7 agency finds Jose's birthmom in May 2005, adoption is on again----still waiting to bring him home. He was 2 years old in Nov.
Like I said it's been a roller coaster. God willing, they will both be home by the end of March. Believe it or not, we'd like to adopt again, but our choices are limited. Guatemala is SO expensive so I don't see how we could afford it agian. We have lost so much money with the failed adoptions There's never a refund if the adoption falls through. My age is a mjor consideration as at 51, I'm too old to be a parent according to some domestic and international agencies. DH and I would gladly adopt an AA baby, but have been told that the baby wouldn't be accepted since we live in a VERY small GA town and the people are VERY narrow minded.
So we may try the state or pray for money to finance #4 from Guatemala. (probablly special needs:-)
The journey is hard and long, but the rewards are so great.
Sandra
__________________
Proud Mama to my Guatemalan Angels
Marianna (07-08-01)
Faith Marie (05-18-05)
It's gonna have to wait until we're back on the Mainland though.
and that most states won't place with us until after we have our baby.
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