Quote:
Originally Posted by Deborah
Very interesting -- I'll be interested in hearing what you come up with. Besides looking at your own pregnancies, maybe look at when you were in utero? Definitely look at any miscarriages ... either you or your mother.
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I did tap last night, but my dh interrupted me and I did not want to tap in front of him...
OK..this is TMI but what the heck.
Last night in the shower, I realized that this monthly menstrual cycle...this 2 weeks of bleeding and spotting..it goes ON an ON an ON...just like my miscarriage did. Additionally the quality of the blood, color, texture and the stringy clots that I have been having for the last 8-9(?) months or so is*just* like when I miscarried, it is not my usual menses at all. I had a 'missed AB' which means, the baby died, but did not pass to the outside of my body...and I retained placental contents as well. So, at least for now, I am concentrating on the miscarriage. The whole situation was a horrible fiasco...I am going to have a lot of aspects to tap on. I'll post the story for anyone who wants to slog through it.
I tried for a year and a half to get pregnant. I knew my cycles, my body etc. SO, my OB suggested I have a laproscopic surgery to 'look and see' if there were any physical issues that would prevent this(this was after the blood workups etc) SO I did. They found both my tubes were block, and they unblocked one of them by injecting dye through it. The other one remains blocked.
2 cycles later I was pregnant. I was shocked and elated. On day, at 8 weeks gestation I was at home with my husband and I felt slightly like I was having my period...I ran to the toilet, and a ton of blood came out. I caught the stuff with my hands and did not feel any baby...then nothing else came out. So I went to the hospital...to have the Doctor check and see if my cervix was closed...and they scanned me. There was the baby...heart beating away...and my cervix was closed.
The OB put my on bed rest for two weeks and then to have another scan. (I did not *really* want to go on bed rest, I felt like if I should just go on with my normal life and see what happens. I felt like if I was going to loose the baby so be it. Bed rest is hell...and fear based ugh. I DON"T like fear based decisions)
At 2 weeks, I went in for the scan. The ultrasound tech had 'trouble' with the scan. I did not question it too much...after all I had made it through 2 weeks of bedrest..and I did have bleeding, but it was old brown blood, not lots of it ...I figured no further placental loss..and certainly the baby was still in there...
2 days after the scan I had an appointment with the OB. He asked how the scan went as he did not have the report yet, and I said "I 'm not sure, R had trouble with it." He gave me a funny look...and said 'let me call and get the report" I knew at that moment that something was wrong. I knew it during the scan, but for 2 days NOONE said anything to me...so after 2 days of noone saying anything to me I chalked it up to silly worrying.
Now for context..at the time, I was a Nurse in a 15 bed rural hospital. You could not spit in that 5000 person town without anyone knowing about it. Radiology was a 500 foot walk in the same building as OB/GYN. I saw that radiologist and Ultrasound tech multiple(5-10) times a day when I was at work. I had worked there for 2 years...had my fertility surgery there, everyone knew we were trying to get pregnant...everyone knows everything about everybody in that town. Like Peyton Place.
SO,my OB walked down to Radiology and talked to Dr F.(the radiologist) and then sat down and told me..."Linda, there is no more baby. You have had a missed AB...and now you will need a D&C to remove the rest of the contents" He was so kind and sweet, and hugged me. I remember sobbing and sobbing...and my dh was an hour drive away at work. ugh...I knew my poor OB was beside himself with the Radiology staff as I was....for being totally insensitive...When he told me I felt like a ton of bricks had hit me. Seriously...I was so ANGRY at the Radiology department.."WHY DID NOONE TELL ME???WHY DID THEY LET THIS DRAG ON??" Now, I'll interject, 'cuz Dr F was an insensitive a$$hole, a bumbling idiot and has no clue, and R, the tech, has no kids and she isn't the most sensitive person in the world either, nor does she strikee me as the brightest spot in the universe either..."
Then I went and had the D&C in that tiny hospital...and I had to continue to work with those people. (NOw I knew that they were just LAME...and doing the best they could...but they still hurt me deeply I am always flabbergasted when health care professionals are so inefficient with their work and insensitive that they HURT patients like this. )
So you can see a bunch of aspects.And look at me I am sobbing right now. wheee!!!
I *know* I am on the right track no question. So, that is a good feeling.
)
Jody
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