At least with MasterCard it is... I don't understand why merchants/vendors/businesses don't READ their merchant agreements when they sign up to accept credit cards - or if they DO read them, why they insist on doing something they know is wrong.

I'm pretty sure Visa has the same policy, but couldn't find it in a quick websearch, but I'd guess they do. As well as the other cc companies.
I understand the fees are an expense for the businesses, but that's exactly it! It's a *business expense* and if they can't deal with it/afford it then they need to change prices, policies, something, kwim?
Anyway, to the OP - that was really rude of the guy. I have no advice.

But (((hugs))) and hope it works out.