Attached Mamas Working Outside the HomeDo you face the unique challenges of balancing your career with your children? Come on in and talk with other moms who find ways to make their situation work for the whole family.
I think I'll be working next year! Happy/sad icon LOL
Dh's (paid) internship ends on December 6th this year, and then he re-starts his Ph.D research for 2009. He thinks he can do paid work for one day a week, but probably not anything beyond that. Unless it's an evening once or twice a week.
So we're looking at either going into more student debt (GRRR Trust me - we have enough!!! ) or me putting my then 2 yo into daycare three or four days a week and working.
There is a daycare centre a close walk to home, and the big kids' school is a two minute walk, so dh (who will be home-based) can do the drop offs/pick ups no problem. And I guess if one of the kids is sick, he'll be here and able to take care of them.
We can do online grocery shopping (I already do most of the time anyway), and I can commute with buses and friends into the city, so the whole logistical side seems manageable. But am I missing anything???
My friend is in Human Resources, and she's pretty sure that with my background, I could get into the field too. And her position is 24 hours a week, and she's making good money. So I think that's the direction I'm headed in.
I've just never put my babies into daycare before! It's a whole new world for me. I know that of my three children, this little guy is probably the best suited to it. He loves being in a group, he's very sociable, and will probably have a great time. It's the mental barrier I have to get over. Is he going to be OK, having other people taking care of him for 6 hours a day?
I think I just need a bit of reassurance that I'm not damaging him. We could get by without me working, but only by getting more debt. Is the trade-off worth it?
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Our first family pic in AGES!! And it's already out of date. Oh well
First of all, I love your sig pic!! What a pretty mama you are.
I know how difficult it is. My DH is working toward his PhD and it's a bear. He is working and it's taking it's toll. We are too old to go into debt () so I'm working as well. I also do 24 hours per week (sometimes a tad less) but my work is on weekends, so our "family time" is cut pretty drastically. But DH is home a lot during the week w/ us so we just work things a bit differently than others, yk?
Every family is different. 24 hrs per week is do-able. You didn't mention what type of work you'd be doing?
Good luck. I know it's a tough decision. I'd been @ home for 7 years when I went back to work. It's added a whole new dimension to my life, and my family has actually benefited from it (not just financially, but emotionally! )
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The test of the morality of a society is what it does for its children. Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Just adding that I went back to work full time in January 07 after seven years at home and it worked out really well for us . Well - really well - since my husband got laid off, got a new job, broke his arm on that job and has been home for almost 2 months now with a cast.
My son Roman was 3 when he started at daycare - and in the right setting he's done beautifully. He loves 'school', his teachers and I am thrilled with the church's program. They teach him, protect him and love him - and he loves going , playing with his friends and its something that in our case, he really needs to get ready for kindergarten. Just because of the type of kid he is.
Anyway, my kids are older (not counting the teenager) at 7 1/2 and 4 1/2 but they adjusted just fine and I work 40 hours a week. Hopefully next month dh will go back to work as well at 40hrs/week and they'll adjust just fine to that as well
Good luck. Its exciting and scary at the same time
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~Barb
Mama to Chelsey-18, Zoey-almost 8 & Roman,almost 5 Please support autism awareness and research. Your donations and prayers are appreciated. Heres my personal page for fundraising for the 5K in November http://www.walknowforautism.org/arizona/personal/team
You didn't mention what type of work you'd be doing?
Aw, thanks for saying I look purty!
I think I'll be doing Recruitment. That's what my friend does, and from the job descriptions I've been reading, with my experience in sales and office management, and a B.A. in Psychology, I'm pretty sure I can get a position. (We live in the capital city, so there are lots of government agencies and head offices to keep recruitment specialists busy!)
I have to create an impressive-sounding resume, which I can get help with. And I have the luxury of a lot of time to research and get ready for this.
In fact, I think I'm actually getting excited! Part of me wishes it was tomorrow, just so I could stop thinking/planning it, and just do it, kwim? Maybe I can start earlier than December, but just one day a week or something? Hmmmm, something to think about...
So Barb, doing 40 hours a week - how does your household run? Are you exhausted all the time? Who does the shopping? How have you organized your family?
I love the picture too! I know you can do it. You worked when Wade was a babe, didn't you? I seem to remember that. You did your degree with little kids. If I can somehow plan to do it, then you totally can. It's perfect, actually, because Mark is at home. Yeah, he's working, but he's present in an emergency.
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Mama to Cole (8), Naomi (7), Adam (6), and Noah (3)
All adopted - All breastfed
Wife to my darling David for 11 whole years
Breastfeeding Counsellor and Doula
Planning to go back to University, January 2009, to do a degree in midwifery.
Buried in paperwork to make it all happen!
I think I'm actually going to get a full-time position - there don't seem to be a lot of jobs for part-time. Hmmmm... I guess that would mean more money, and that we could probably afford daycare and maybe a cleaning lady (?)
Just know that you will be in the company of many loving moms who are in the same sort of situation as you are!
I have been there! After SAH....having to WOH.
Now, I am actually WAH but it took a lot of business planning and work to get to do so. Next Fall, I am actually having to at least double my time working from 10 hours per week this year (its been heaven) to at least 20 and perhaps even 40 (ugh). I am having to do so to pay for my oldest ds's college expenses!
Phew!
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~ Mari
Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.
Mahatma Gandhi
Well, if childcare is going to damage children, then mine must be damaged
What I've found is that not only have my children done well in childcare, but they have thrived. They are both pretty neat children.
I first HAD to go back to work full time when my younger was just over one year old (because I had to pay off MY student loans ). It was so incredibly difficult picking a childcare agency. I must have looked at at least a dozen. I agonized over her while I was gone at first, but then I saw that she was okay. I was still the mom, but she had other people who loved her too and more love is always good.
Then, by the time my younger was born, I had paid off my student loans and had my own business/practice and was able to work as much or as little (or not at all) as I chose. I slung him and brought him to work until he was 7 months and then put him in daycare two days/week. I promise that I would not be working right now were it detrimental to his well-being.
Both are doing great. Honestly. I would not tell you were it not true.
It will probably surprise you how well he will do. It will be hard at first. I know. But, with time, you'll see that there are definite pros for HIM.
It's scary trusting others with your child. We'll hold your hand.
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Rebecca
On this day, I promise myself that I will take better care of my children's mother. I will eat healthy food, drink clean water, avoid fake foods, run, swim, climb, and stretch; I will read and I will take time to just be.
I think what others have said is true! It will be OK - children are soooo adaptable. And I think Rebecca's telling the truth because her kids always seem to be very happy and glowing in pics! And you can't fake that!
I work from home part-time but I NEED someone to care for my younger kids while I work, at least part of the time that I work (and I really need to work more and I need to stop working in the middle of the night!). I'm dragging my feet because of my own hang-ups and the cost (not sure it will pay off right away) but it's under consideration here.
Thanks mamas! I'm feeling a lot more confident now
So the decision will be 1) daycare centre, or 2) care at someone's house. There's a network of in-their-own-home caregivers (www.porse.co.nz). And I can see pros and cons - at a centre, there's lots of adult eyes, but there are also lots of kids. Diseases get around, etc.
At someone's home, there's a small group of kids, but I'm scared to death of all those crazy nannys who beat children when nobody's looking, kwim? Abuse can happen easier when it's in someone's home.
Like you say, there are pros and cons both ways. I like the home environment because it feels less "institutional." LOL. And he'll be there alot, not just a few hours a week like a preschool. But look around. Is it tough to get a spot like it is here? Go with your gut. It will be okay.
Yeah, I'm just crossing my fingers that I can find something that I 1) enjoy, and 2) pays well enough for us to avoid any new debt. I think I'll have to go full-time, unfortunately.
But then, that's probably good. I remember reading a study about how women who work part-time do more hours of work in a week (paid and un-paid) than women who work outside of the home full-time. Something about how they chose part-time because it would allow them to still do all the housework, so they did it, and had very little assistance from spouses/partners because of it. Those women who worked full-time didn't feel guilty about getting help. It was very interesting to think about!
Trust me - we have enough!!! 
) or me putting my then 2 yo into daycare three or four days a week and working. 
First of all, I love your sig pic!! What a pretty mama you are. 
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