Hi I'm new to Amity Mama and am in need of some advice. My dd and I are in our 4th month of bf. I want to continue exclusively bf until 6 months but I work part-time for my dh's aunt. She lets me bring dd to work with me but everytime I go to feed her she is saying something about starting her on solids. She also says she nurses too much. She eats about every 2 hours. I don't know if that is too much or not. I just feed her when she wants to eat. What do I tell my dh's aunt? I don't want to be rude and I have said that I want to wait but she says that she should already be starting solids even though I have quoted that bf babies don't need solids until at least 6 months of age. My dh is also starting on me. He says he can't keep her because I bf. (Even when he is at home I have to take her to work with me) He says if I would start feeding her she would stay with him more. I don't believe that and really don't want to start feeding her. What do I do?

Sounds to me like you are doing things right - by feeding on demand although every 2 hours for a 4 month old seems a little often to me (I know somone will correct me if I'm wrong). I would make sure that your DD is getting the hindmilk when you nurse. This is the most nutritious part of the breastmilk and the most calorically dense. It could be she's not 'emptying' the breast fully and that's why she's still nursing so frequently.

Regarding solids, the American Association of Pediatrics recommends waiting on solids until infants are 6-8 months of age. Please check out their site and share that information with your DH. Also get your pediatrician to back you up on this. You can also contact your local LLL or lactation consultant for additional information.

Regarding DH's aunt and the issues your DH has..have you considered pumping & storing your milk? That would mean that your DH could assist in the feeding, making him feel more a part of the process. At her age, the risk of nipple confusion is pretty much nonexistent.

As far as what to tell your Aunt, I guess be polite but honest. You really appreciate her allowing you to bring DD to work, but the feeding schedule/system that you have selected is the healthiest for the baby and for you. Mention that once your doctor (stress that, I'm betting that will go far with her) approves your baby to start on solids, you are sure that the number of times you nurse each day will decrease, allowing you to dedicate even more time to your work. Until then, ask her to please be patient as it will only be a few more weeks until your DD's digestive system is mature enough to handle solids. If she says "Well, we gave solids early and saw no problems.", thank her and mention that you will talk to your pediatrician at the next appointment, but currently the recommendations are to delay introduction of solid food.

Good luck!

I do have a stash of bm in the freezer. DD doesn't like to eat any other way but fresh from the spout. DH says she won't eat for him. I don't know I've never tried. Second I don't have a ped. , the only one in my town told me (when dd was born) that bottle feeding was better that bf. That was the last time I let that quack look at my dd. I use my family dr. and I don't think he knows any more about bf than I do. But I can lie to my dh's aunt. Thanks for the idea.

Now I will be worrying whether dd is getting enough hindmilk. She seems satisfied when she is thru eating. She eats for at least 15 minutes. She will go longer between feedings if I keep her occupied but it is much easier sometimes just to feed her. I never thought she might not be getting enough to eat, she is growing well. I hope I'm not doing anything wrong. I don't know anyone else who bf. The lc here in town (she works through the health department) is so busy she seldom gets a chance to talk and I hate to bother her. I appreciate your advice and I will blantently lie to dh's aunt without feeling guilty about it. She is soooo pushy but how can you not love someone who will let you bring your child to work with you.

You're doing super! It seems as if baby and you are bonding wonderfully. What the other poster said about the hindmilk is important. I still feel the "tingles" when my hindmilk lets down. Some women feel it and some don't. However, I'm still exclusively nursing my 6 1/2 month son - no bottles, no pacifiers, no solids. He has tasted a few things, like a banana, pear, and a sweet potato---but, that's it. I would say that I nurse him approximately every 2-3 hours, except when he goes to bed at night. He sleeps about 7-8 hours at night. When he was 3 or 4 months, he was nursing about the same. There was a time when he nursed maybe every 4 hours!! I thought something was wrong. Then he went back to every 2 or 3 hours. It really just depends. As long as baby is thriving, then no need to worry. She might be going through a growth spurt. You will usually nurse quite frequently when baby is "spurting", even waking during the night. My plans are to nurse him "exclusively" until he is a year old. My pediatrician told me that a normal baby breastfed OR formula fed doesn't NEED solids for at least a year. I am soo glad to hear a pediatrician support breastfeeding.

For husband:
My husband always gives our son a bath at night. This is his time for special one-to-one bonding. He also trys to sit with me when I nurse him in the evenings. He wants to be as much a part of our son's nurturing as he can. There are many things a husband can do to feel "a part" of the whole baby nuturing experience. He doesn't have to feed baby to bond with baby. I support this tremendously.

Work:
You're doing great with patience. I would continue to hold your ground. Whatever is best for baby, is the route to go. Nursing at the breast instead of pumping is always rewarding. If Aunt is still willing to cooperate with your nursing at work , then baby wins!!! If it's because she thinks you are not doing "your job", but nursing too much instead, then that's a judgment call on your side, please your Aunt?? or care for your baby?? Trying to work it out so there is a "win-win" situation is usually best. Don't feel inadequate just because you're outnumbered (your husband and your Aunt) -You have all of us here at Amity!! Keep doing what you know is the best for baby.

Sounds like you are doing wonderfully to me!

Alot of confusion surrounds breastfeeding, there is so much misinformation out there that has been spread around for years. Your breastfed baby doesn't need solids, in fact, there are alot of breastfeeding moms on here that delay solids up until around 12 months or so. If your baby is growing and is happy and healthy, what more could you want? :) It is hard to keep doing what you know is best, when you have so many around you questioning it. It was really hard for me with my son, my mom and sister were constantly pressuring me to do things their way. When your DH's aunt says things to you, just say happily, "Thanks for the advice, I will keep that in mind." No need to be rude, but you are doing what is best for your baby, and don't let her attitude make you question that.

Best of luck to you!

Just wanted to add...
that you should check out La Leche League's website, www.lalecheleague.org and see if there is a meeting near you. If not, it sounds like there is a definite need, and you sound like a great candidate to start one up in your area.
The website also has lots of useful information. You might also like the book The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. It has a ton of information in it. If your doctor is willing, have him read it too.
And I just wanted to second (3rd or 4th) that you really are doing great, it is quite an achievement to do what you know is right with breastfeeding when you don't have a lot of real life support!!! You go Mama!

Thank you guys for all the support. I really needed to hear that I was doing things correctly. It is sooo hard when you don't have any support. I talked to my dh about this and he has said that he agrees with me and he will stop saying that dd needs to be fed. Unfortunately dh's aunt will not agree but I think I am strong enough to put her off for a while. I think I will start feeding her at 6 months, she is starting to watch me as I eat and try to grab my food.

Unfortunately we don't have a LLL league anywhere near here but I have been thinking about starting some kind of support group. I can talk to the lc here and get some names I'm sure. Anyway thanks again for the support. It means a lot to me.