I just finished reading the thread asking if 4 is really a big family and I have to say that to me, right now in a newly blended family it is very big!:lol:


My soon to be DH has two girls and I have my two kids and we are all under the same roof full time. It's only been 2 months (and part of that time we only had 2 children at a time due to summer visitation schedules) so I expected things to still be new and stressful at this point still. I just under estimated exactly *how* stressful it would be I guess.

I'm use to a small family. Just me and my tow kids. The same goes for Ben. Neither one of us is use to "answering" to another and all that jazz. Thankfully we parent very similarly so there has been little conflict there.

It's not awful or anything it's just not perfect. I've found that despite knowing better I had some fairytale "happily ever after" dreams hiding deep down in my heart. Add in his ex stirring the pot and deciding to stop paying her CS and my ex getting pissy about the amount of his CS and our own money issues from me not working for the summer and some days I feel like I'm going to lose my mind.I'm gleefully looking forward to school starting in 3 weeks!:lol:

I'm exhausted just by the amount of laundry and dishes I have to wash these days. My grandma use to do a lot of that for me when she was babysitting while I was at work. :hahaha:

ANyway, I just found this forum and hope to learn something from you seasoned mamas of large families!:)

we have a blended family. At times, it is very difficult but for the most part we don't use words like "step" or "half" because I feel like it almost diminishes the importance of those relationships. Since all of the children live with us full time, we don't really have the "you're not my mom/dad" issue.

Mostly the issues come from other family members like g'mothers, aunts, etc. That is really annoying because we try so hard to live as one and some people don't feel the need to respect that.

Congrats on joining our ranks!

Thank you!!

I am very grateful that both families are completely welcoming to the newcomers! lol My family is well versed in blended families and "step" and "half' have never been used. (My brothers are my brothers all the same regardless of if, or how much they are blood related.) My MIL is just thrilled to have two more grandchildren! We are very blessed in this way.

Living as one is the way we want to go. So far it really is going well, I'm just not the most laid back person on the planet and I can be really hard on myself when things aren't "perfect".

well, my side of the family is 100% supportive. My DH's mom and aunt accept that this is our life, but they don't support or encourage it. The non-custodial parents in our case tend to be issues every few months but it's nothing we can't manage. Overall, my children have been in each other's lives since toddler hood so it's been no trouble for them to adjust. :)

Not a "blended family" through marriage. But we are sort of a blended family as we do foster care so we are adding children none of us have ever met into our own family. It is interesting for sure. My kids didn't know what "bickering" was till we had the kids we have now. Bickering is NOT tolerated & it is much better now than it used to be. Unfortunately my youngest has picked up some unpleasant behaviours. Par for the course though.

We have had some kids come into our family without too many problems, but others...well problems. But we deal with it!!

Also doing day-care and babysitting has brought other kids into our family. This was easier as the parents were of a similar mind-set or I didn't care for their kids!!


Kerri mom to:

Amanda(17), Emma(15), Maddison(13), foster dd(12),
Jonah(10), foster ds(10), Saige & Claire(7, identical twin girls), foster dd(6),
foster ds(5), my little boy Teagan(3) PLUS: 2 horses, 1 pony, 3 dogs, 2
cats, 1bunny rabbit, 4 guinea pigs, 3 rats( one is naked!), 1 teddy bear
hamster & 3 dwarf hamsters & fostering a fuzzy orange tabby
kitten

*************************************

I guess we are! If just my bio children lived with me, I'd have two with one on the way. Dh has two who live with us, so that's 4 with one on the way. We've been doing this gig for nearly 12 years now together. Can I just suggest family and/or marriage counseling at some point? Our bouts in therapy have saved our azzes more than once, when the blended family issues loomed large. Those issues seemed to pop up once the glitter wore of when we first got together, whenever the ex's made waves, and once the kids grew into adolescence.

Good luck to you. It's quite the ride, but I feel so blessed to have found my family where it is.