We gave DS one - he still uses it for sleep at 3.5 (a lot of that, I think, is due to a little regression since I weaned and then immediately got pg) and it's ok with me, I know he'll give it up soon enough.

I wasn't planning on giving one to DD - but she wants to suck constantly. I nurse her on both sides and then she wants to pacify to sleep - which would be ok most of the time except for the huge bleeding spot on my right breast. I've been giving her my pinky to suck on when she wants to pacify - and I'm wondering what's the difference in giving her a pacifier and taking it out once she's asleep, like I do my finger - if it's only a few times a day?

I know "they" say to wait until 3 weeks to introduce anything like that but I just CAN'T let her suck longer than necessary on this breast until it heals... and in the middle of the night it's hard to get into the right position to allow her to suck on my finger.

So... what's your take on it?

give her one. :)

My experience with all five of my kids is what the pediatrician told us 9 years ago - even babies are smart enough to know what is the "real thing" and what isn't. :D All my girls took a pacifier at some point and none of them had any issues with nipple confusion or nursing problems. If a baby has sucking problems, isn't latching on, isn't thriving, etc. that's one thing. I think it's also a problem when a pacifier is given to get the baby to sleep longer at night instead of feeding them first.

But, I think it's totally reasonable to offer a pacifier after nursing well, if you don't have any problems. Babies have an instinctive need to suck, and it *is* soothing. If you try to stick a pacifier in a baby's mouth who is hungry, they will usually spit it out or cry. It *might* buy five minutes time for Jack in the car - but that's it if he's hungry. The one kiddo I have who didn't take a pacifier for very long learned to self-soothe by sucking on her two middle fingers. Let me tell you this -it's a LOT harder to "get rid of" two fingers than a pacifier...plus it does a lot more damage to their soft palette and teeth than an orthodontic pacifier.

We like the Avent ones, FTR.

Thank you all so much - it's nice to have reassurance. :)

Erik--held out all of 1 week. He clearly had no nursing issues, and he went back and forth between them just fine. We took the paci away at 4 months, when his need to suck was decreasing. He was fine with it.

Anders--I waited a few weeks, and he did actually have issues going back and forth between paci and breast. He figured it out, but for the first several weeks, every time he'd nurse after using the pacifier, it took him a few seconds to latch on and start sucking right. He weaned himself from the pacifier at 7 months--just refused to accept it. It took me a few days to figure it out--I'd be rocking him to sleep, trying to put the pacifier in, he'd be spitting it out. LOL!

I was anti-pacifier before I had kids. ;) I am still anti-walk around and play with a pacifier in the mouth as a toddler/preschooler... but I don't get up in arms about it. I also know that every child needs some security on some days, and I don't make any judgements about people I see. just yesterday, in fact, my friend came to playgroup and her 17 mo old had his pacifier in. She said they both woke up in need of a little security (his twin sister was carrying her lovey blanket), and they both had their security for about the first 30 minutes, when they were able to set them aside. I thought it was great how she read their needs.

Oh, I didn't use a paci in place of comfort nursing ALL of the time. I still nursed for comfort and security. But there were times when the baby wanted to suck, but did NOT want milk. Especially in the first few months, I had milk a plenty, and it was hard for a baby to nurse wihtout getting milk.