This weekend, dh and I visited dd at camp. The schedule informed us that immediately following the divine liturgy, the children would have a little show for the parents. So, dh and I went directly from the liturgy site to the show site (a big open field). Some people were setting up chairs in a line. We decided to stand and stood behind the first row of chairs -- the only one there at the time. People continued to trickle in for over a half hour. Just before the show started, a couple set up directly chairs behind us. Then, the woman says, "Excuse me. But somehow we have gotten ourselves situated here behind you. Could you stand behind us?" I said, "We want to see and hear our daughter." They were pretty put off by this and the energy around us got yucky.

We could have moved of course. But the area we were in was already crowed and we felt that we had no obligation to move just because they wanted to be closer to the front. Our daughter was in one of the first groups and as soon as she was done, we did move completely off to the side. We just did not want to be there. DH and I would never have gone to stand in front of people already seated.

What would you have done? Let the latecomers have your spot? Stood your ground? They were our age and appeared to be physically well.

Obviously I still feel lots of emotion over this incident since I am posting here. Nothing big happened. Except that some of their friends also jumped in and suggested dh and I sit on the ground -- which was sopping wet. But dh and I were both left feeling really yuky. I'm wondering how I could have handled this better.

People can be so interesting in a crowd setting. I swear, we went to see Curious George with our four kids, and purposely sat far away from the only other family. Someone came and sat DIRECTLY BEHIND US. Why? It peeves me off.

Anyway, I think that I would have just ignored them. I generally do that when I don't want to be involved in conflict. I simply do not respond at all.

I don't think you were being rude, and if there were other spaces for them to sit, they could have. They chose not to. Not your problem. If the ground had been dry, you could have sat, but it wasn't so no worries.

I can imagine it did leave you feeling bad. But, I don't think you did anything wrong, and you were kind enough to move when your daughter was done.

i would have probably done just what you did. i would never put my chairs up behind someone & ask them to move when they were there first.

how rude of them - they presumed that YOU would move for them?

Nope, you did what we would have done - only I'm not sure I would have responded at all, I might have just given them the silent treatment and stood my ground, but then I can be rude, too LMBO

I think you handled the situation well and you should let it go.

I have to admit, I probably would have moved. Well, did you know your DD would be in the beginning? If so, I would have said, "Our daughter is in one of the first group, and we stood here so we could see her. As soon as she finishes, we'll move away." I also may have added something like, "When we got here, there was only the one row of chairs. It's amazing how it's filling up, isn't it?" in a friendly tone.

But yes, I think they were rude. It just wouldn't be a big enough point for me to feel like I had to "stand my ground". I can move away, know that I didn't do anything wrong, and have it be a moment of being gracious even when it wasn't deserved.

:hug:

I am very nonconfrontational. I would have either asked if I could stay until my kid was done, or tried to find a way to move to place where we both could see. I have to say that if the others became a little short with me I probably would have resonded in kind.

Honestly, I would not have stood if everyone else was sitting.

I think you were left feeling yucky because on an energetic level you accepted some of these other people's "yuck" as your own. Let it go. Doesn't sound like you and the DH did anything wrong whatsoever, and were actually very courteous and moving once you saw your daughter's group perform.

Let it go... wash it away.... :) Life's too short to sweat the small stuff. ;)

was it a mixed bag or was everyone sitting and you were the only ones standing??

was it a mixed bag or was everyone sitting and you were the only ones standing??

About half sitting and half standing -- some places had 2 rows sitting, some only one. It was not organized and everyone was doing their own thing.


Thank you all for your feedback. I feel better knowing so many of you think my response was o.k.

I think you were left feeling yucky because on an energetic level you accepted some of these other people's "yuck" as your own. Let it go. Doesn't sound like you and the DH did anything wrong whatsoever, and were actually very courteous and moving once you saw your daughter's group perform.

Let it go... wash it away.... :) Life's too short to sweat the small stuff. ;)

I agree. That is why I was wondering "Why do I care so much?" In the past, I would have moved. And felt resentful. I guess I am working out my own issues :smirk: Someday, when I've grown a bit more, I will stay if I want to and move if that seems like the better idea and be fine either way and not have to post about such a little thing.

About half sitting and half standing -- some places had 2 rows sitting, some only one. It was not organized and everyone was doing their own thing.


Thank you all for your feedback. I feel better knowing so many of you think my response was o.k.
well then I would say you did the right thing and those people...the nerve!:happy: