Overall, I have a lot of patience when it comes to the kids, as long as they're being respectful. I don't like to put limitations on their make believe (except no guns, that sort of thing)

For the last two weeks, Kaya has been acting like a baby....A *lot*!! Normally, I don't mind that, but she has started to really do it a lot and I will admit it is *really* starting to get on my nerves.

I know that children of this age often have regressions, and I expect that. But this baby stuff seems a bit over the top. She was never a whiner, and now she is. She was Miss Vocabulary from a young age, and now she's starting to talk in one word sentences in a baby voice. She'll pull on my clothes to get my attention. I am having to promt her on asking for things using her manners, though she's been saying please since she started talking.

If there's one thing I do not have much patience for, it's whiny kids.

Kaya has recently made friends with a 17 month old that we see regularly. I think that this is part of what has sparked the baby thing, too.

I have tried ignoring it. I have told her time and time again to use her big girl voice. I've even told her that real babies wear diapers, take lots of naps and go to bed early. If it was just a once in a while thing, I might be able to deal, but it just seems to be happening more and more. When we talk about it, she says she is just pretending, and it makes me feel bad for losing my patience.

But, I just am having a hard time handling it, it is getting very frustrating.

Does anyone have any suggestions? I feel like I am about ready to snap if she comes and whimpers at me or pulls on me again. :eek: Ok, deep breath.

no advice, just hugs... it will pass... kids get whiney sometimes, and it's harder to deal with when it's been a while ;) you get out of practice. She is probably just needing some extra attention due to some developmental milestone or perhaps the money problems and stress attached to them are wearing on her? Kids are pretty empathic/empathetic... she may be picking up on that.. in combination with being around a much younger child... she is just trying things out.

Its an age thing.:) Erin did this also. It drove me nuts!
Be patient keep doing what you are doing. She will outgrow it. As long as she knows you won't let her get away with it.

:big hug:

Sue

nak

I usually say "i can't hear you..i dont understand whining"

no advice, just hugs... it will pass... kids get whiney sometimes, and it's harder to deal with when it's been a while ;) you get out of practice. She is probably just needing some extra attention due to some developmental milestone or perhaps the money problems and stress attached to them are wearing on her? Kids are pretty empathic/empathetic... she may be picking up on that.. in combination with being around a much younger child... she is just trying things out. :ditto: :big hug:

Caleb did this recently. Garrett is 2 and doesn't talk like a big kid, like a toddler.....so recently Caleb started mimicing the toddler sounds, acting babyish, etc. I just tell him Garrett is learning by example and if he talks like a big boy, he will soon talk like a big boy too. Its a phase. But I know how you feel!

When my girls are pretending something that I am not handling well (Samantha and Beth like to be cats, noisy ones, oh, and whiney horses (not whinny, winey)) I explain that I am not ready to pretend with them and they need to pretend elsewhere. Loud horses have to go outside and noisy cats can play in their room. I explain that if they continue to be near me or try to include me in their make-believe, the horses may have to spend the night in the barn outside or the cats might have to spend the night in a box. This usually elicits giggles and them trotting off somewhere else. I try to keep it fun, letting them know I know they are having fun but that I just to not want to be included at that time. I also make a point of including myself sometimes.

and I hate to say for us it hasnt gotten much better. My dd is SIX and in kindergarten and still talks baby talk A LOT but for her I think it is almost a habit like chewing ones nails and we are trying to break her of it. But we don't show our frustration besides asking her calmly to use a big girl voice because we cant understand her, which is absolutely true. Her baby talk is so affected it is totally unintelligible.

For us it started when she was around 3. I think it was being the middle child and having a high needs younger sibling, she figured being a baby was what it was all about to get attention. And all the positive reinforcement on the planet for "big girl" stuff didnt make a huge dent in her behavior but I still think it helps over the long haul. Praise her for the helpful mature things she does like cleaning up, sharing, drawing a picture etc. And basically refuse to respond to the whiney talk and baby talk except to say, "please use your words so I can help you" (if she is whining or pulling on you) and something like "use your big girl voice because I cannot understand you." (when talking baby talk). Sometimes anger wells up in me when Emma does this but I do feel it is somewhat a habit, a way to get attention and partially a birth order thing. So I dunno what else to offer. Hope she grows out of it soon!

No advice for you...except never come visit my house! LOL My kids would drive you INSANE! ;) They do whine...probably daily. Picture that x3! hehe But my heck *I* still whine to DH once in a while! ;)

Seriously, I pick my battles. Acting like a baby is not something that I'm going to pay much attention to b/c there are far worse things to reprimand them for. LOL

Another post to add (b/c did you know you cannot edit quick replies?), when my kids DO whine, the only way I "handle" it is to not pay attention to it. Jordan is the biggest "offender". If he sits here whining and blabbering b/c I tell him no he cannot eat the 5th sandwich since coming home 10 minutes ago (this kid is a bottomless pit!) and he starts whining and blabbering, I will not even pay attention to it and will calmly say "Jordan, go sit down until you can talk to me like your age, then I will talk to you." Doesn't always work immediately, but generally will and then I can explain the reason he cannot have another sandwich is b/c dinner is in 30 minutes (or whatever).

Hey Meeshi, how old is she? My suggestion would be to get her or make her a baby doll and ask her to animate the doll when she's playing with it, but that she's a big girl, so when she's done playing with the doll the baby voice goes away too.

I hear you on the frustration with sudden changes in personality or behavior. I had a big adjustment period when Faith went from 2.9 years old angel to opinionated preschooler and now grade schooler.

If it happens in my house then I tell my kids one of two things:

1. I don't hear whining.

2. In our house we speak English, not Whinese.

Keep in mind that she is only 3 years old; in my book that IS still a baby. Sure for a while, maybe a long while, she was trying on bigger kids shoes, but her smaller shoes still fit and they are comfortable. Regression is normal - but to a certain extent she might be acting her age. If Rashi whines (he's 3 1/2) then I tell him that I don't hear whining and that he needs to use a nice voice if he wants me to listen. On the other hand, maybe it's a cue that she needs more attention; pick her up, hold her.

Just my opinion

Oh---poor you!! :)
Shame---my friends little girl 'gave' herself a stutter for a month.
Finally she stopped one day and they were so surprised. They asked her why she wasn't stuttering anymore (in a nice way) and she happily replied "I'm sick of that now"
Kids are funny.
:happy:

Goodness, I'm surprised at all the ideas to negate her behavior, rechannel it or stop it.

Katie has gone through this once in a while, and I usually *join* her. I say, "Awwww, mama's baby," and cuddle her and treat her like a baby. Usually she needs to act that out for five or ten minutes, then loses interest. I'm also careful that if she wants to do something like, say, draw art or do a craft, I'll say, "Oh, sorry, baby, babies can't use crayons. You are too little! You just stay here and cuddle." Usually that sends her off running to do something else. ;)

I think this is a need expressed, that's best met simply by joining and extending it...allowing her to work it out as quickly as possible. It's never turned into a habit with Katie.

Now if it's simply being whiney, I'll just ignore it. If she whines two or three times more, I say, "I'm sorry, I can't understand what you're saying when you whine." I give it as little attention as possible.

Check out www.naomialdort.com for some inspiration. :) She has helped me a lot with a fresh perspective when needed.

walt is a natural mimic. We had a friend with two kids stay with us for a while, and her younger son has a lisp and some other verbal quirks. For six months after they left, Walt would talk *exactly* like my friend's son when he was trying to get a rise out of me.

Keep ignoring it for the most part. It's totally a phase, probably brought on by being with this younger child. Can you spend some time with a child her own age so there is a little more balance? Also, I have zero tolerance for whining...I mean, it's just NOT allowed here, not even a little bit. I ignore it, or I say, "I can't understand you, try talking in a regular voice." A friend of mine has a mantra that she repeats to her children if they whine: "whiners get nothing."

Another approach would be to tell her that if she chooses to act younger than her age, she will start to be treated as a younger child. Make a list of all the fun things she will miss out on, and tack on not-so-fun stuff that younger kids have to do (like nap? ;) ).

I know it's frustrating, but this too shall pass!

Tara

Also, I have zero tolerance for whining...I mean, it's just NOT allowed here, not even a little bit. I ignore it, or I say, "I can't understand you, try talking in a regular voice."

Phew, am I ever glad you said this, Tara. This same thing holds true in our house, and I was starting to think that we are way too strict or something. I can count on my two hands the number of times (before this baby stuff) that the girls have *ever* whined to us.

I simply can't deal with it, it's like nails on a chalk board to me.

It's not so much that I don't want Kaya to act like a baby, it's that she has been acting like a bratty baby, a whiny baby, a demanding baby. Part of me thinks she is trying to get around the things we don't allow by saying she's just pretending. She is incredibaly intelligent, and I have a feeling there's more to it that just pretend.

Knock on wood, I haven't seen her act that way since she got up from her nap yesterday. Before the nap, I straight up told her that she can be a happy baby, a silly baby, a cute baby, but whiny, bratty babies have to take extra naps and can't ride bikes. Maybe that will do it?

Whining may be normal in other peoples houses, but it's not going to happen in our house.

Kaylen has been acting like a baby a lot lately, but I assumed that was due to my pregnancy. I haven't done anything about it past saying that I can't understand her when she talks like a baby and praising how big she is when she acts her age. I always talk to her about what a great big sister she will be, etc., and how many things she is able to do now that she is a big girl, hoping that will deter her from regressing further, but I'm not counting on it.

Yesterday Peyton (2.10 years old) and I went out to lunch with a friend who has a 4 year old and 6 month old. I would think that Peyton would identify more with the 4 year old, but noooooo - she acted like a baby all day. First she had a tantrum about needing to use a high chair because the 'baby' was using one. (Funny thing is that Peyton has never used a high chair!) Then we went for a walk and I was carrying the baby in a sling. Later, the mom took the baby and Peyton insisted on getting in the sling and nursing, then fell asleep. I walked with her in that sling for about an hour. She is almost 3 years old! Here I am waiting for her to wean soon!

I'd say the behavior is normal and temporary. It's sounds like you are addressing it perfectly too... with gentle guidance. As frustrating as it is, just know it will pass.