my sil who doesn't have any children but has a pysc. edu. recommended it when i asked her what i should do about my crazy dd. lol
i read in and about 2 days and have started counting. my dh still hasn't read it and i really want him to so we can be a better parenting team. so anyway i just wanted to know if any of you mamas are using this method? and how it 's going and what are some things you do for a 3 year old and start behaviors?

I don;t agree with it, this is what I wrote for another place about it.
I really have a problem with the control aspect of this type of parenting. Time outs and seclusion are not an OK thing to do when it comes to my children.
The whole 'Thats one..' (supposed to stop bad behavior in it's track thing..well, it's bull) So we basically give our kids three chances, and then we punish them by sending them away to 'think about'.
In the 'how to use this book' section it tells you that if the child tries to leave the room or doesn't;t want to do the time out, then you LOCK them in. It;s too much of a 'I'm the mother- you are the child so you must listen to me, if not you get punished' type of book. That doesn't sit well with me at all.

The 123 magic way of doing things doesn't TEACH our kids anything. All is does is show one way of stopping them from doing something and then there is a punishment at the end if they don;t obey.

Did you get to the part where the author says that children need training the same way wild animals do.? WILD ANIMALS?
He also says that there are times when a spanking may be appropriate. Turn off right there for me.


Instead of trying to control our kids and make them obey by making them 'take a 5'., how about we find out WHY they are acting up in the first place?
Lets work with our kids and teach some inner discipline, instead of trying to control, threaten, and punish them.
There is a fine line between discipline and punishment..I think this book crossed that line.

Sure there are some good things. I like the chapter on encouraging good behavior, but over all, it;s got 2 thumbs down from me.

I read it. It is too punitive for my style of parenting. I do count. But, it is just a warning that I am not comfortable with what is going on. If I get to 3, which is rare, I remind them that we all live together and by them doing X, I am not comfortable and I need to be comfortable. What can we do together so they we are all happy. They know that by counting, that is what I am getting at. Usually by 2, they are asking would I be happier if they did X in their room or outside, etc. They do not count when I am doing something that aggravates them. I usually get a "Mama STOP!" :) But, we are working on communicating our feeling and desires better.

Books I prefer over this one are:
any by Barbara Coloroso
any by Nancy Samalin
Hold on To Your Kids by Neufeld and Mate
Continuum Concept
Non-violent Communication
I can't remember the title of the one by Haim Ginot