H was hurt on the bus coming home yesterday. A younger boy (second grade) ended up punching H three times in the ribs, and the final punch in the stomach. Mrs. T (a wonderful and blessed bus driver and woman!) stopped what was going on and put the child in the front seat. She informed me immediately what happened, and stated that she would be reporting him. What the repercussions are of the behavior, I don't know.

What I do know is that this is not the first time this has happened. I'm afraid, this won't be the last. I don't want H to feel unsafe either on the bus or at school.

After discussing with him more about what happened, turns out something similar happened on the way TO school. I don't know what it is about H that is causing him to be the one that gets hurt---if he instigates the problem, if he's just in the middle of a problem, if he tries to get involved when he shouldn't, or if he's just innocent---but it has GOT to stop. I just don't know what to do. Of course, we don't want him to ever hit. But, at the same time, shouldn't he be able to fight back? (which he has NEVER done) I don't want to teach him not to start a fight, but be able to finish it, if you know what I mean.

He is a kind, gentle, smart kid. I don't want to harden him into something twisted and mean in order to not be picked on at school or on the bus.

Perhaps, you have tools that I can help H with, or guide me in the right direction. My emotions are running high right now. My heart is hurting for him.

Any advice is MUCH appreciated!!!!!

I'm so sorry Missy. :( I'm going to send you a pm.

I was terrorized on my school bus, and my parents never even noticed, knew or cared I guess. I know *I* didn't instigate it, I was the quiet kid that really just wanted to melt into the seat. One girl was especially evil to me, and after YEARS of picking on me, she tripped me and I snapped and pushed her up against the wall and I saw her SCARED, she never messed with me again. Unfortunately I never stood up to the entire rest of the bus so it was a never-ending thing for me until I was old enough to start driving to school myself.

I was never actually hit, but the scars are there just the same, I kind of wish I WAS physically attacked because then someone somewhere would have taken my pain seriously....one day I was oh, say about 14 and I came home from the bus so upset I remember vividly planning my suicide....the only thing that stopped me was a deep fear of hell.

Take this seriously and nip it in the bud now while he's young. Good luck mama....and yes, I do think he needs to learn how to stick up for himself, but he needs help doing that.

i'm pm'ing u missy

Poor guy. Hope they discipline the other kid(s) involved. Why?.....sometimes kids just get picked on/chose....why I don't know....I was in 7th grade then nothiing ever again, I'm still clueless as to what I did.

I do not believe school buses are safe. Not the buses themselves, but the huge crowd of children with ONE adult, who happens to be otherwise occupied trying to drive that huge monstrosity safely.

We tried it. I am happy that I had a child old enough to really tell me what is going on on the bus (Lauren was in 8th grade last year when she and Max (K) rode the bus for a few weeks). She is a smart, truthful, intelligent mature girl and she told me that I would not want them on that bus if I knew what it was like. Nothing horrible happened to them physically, but it just was not a good place to be.

So, I drive them in the mornings and pick them up in the afternoons. Yes, it is a pain, but they are worth it. Fortunately, Lauren will be driving in two years:)

(((H))) and ((((Missy))))

Can he not *not* take the bus? I know you have posted about this sort of thing before, can you just avoid the bus? Or is this happening at school too? If it was me, I'd be driving my kid to school, and if it was happening in any form at school? I'd pull my kid out til it was resolved fully. Bullies need to be taken seriously. I don't get what makes some kids think they can bully others....? They must be getting away with it at home or school or something...I just can't imagine not having a school that gets kids like that away from the other kids. :confused:

Driving him seems the safest option. Or homeschooling him. I know you've mentioned your little guy has gone through so much negativity since starting school. Makes me so sad for him.