I had a good childhood, but I grew up in an un-magical, even anti-magical, home. My parents are extremely practical. Any "wonder" in my life was created naturally by me as a child. I want to create magic for my children, but because I wasn't taught how, I'm really at a loss.

How do you make your childrens' lives magical? Do you have special activities at bedtime, etc? Holiday traditions? Secret signs to say "I love you?" Family stories? Wonder-full games?

There's so much imagination at Amity's! I know many of you must have some ideas. Please share how your childhood was magical, and how you are creating that atmosphere for your children.

TIA,
Rebecca

Have you seen this website:

www.magicalchildhood.com

I love it. Lots of great ideas.

HTH

oooh thanks for posting that magical childhood website!! Lots of great ideas on there!

As to the OP, well I'm not sure I'm leading my son in the direction of having a magical childhood.. I mean nothing seems spectacular or out of the ordinary to me, but we do alot. We play outside everyday, he loves to sit and watch ants crawling around and worms wriggling out from the ground. We play with his little girl friend down the street almost everyday, lately it's all been pool related b/c it's so hot, either in our blow up pool, their pool, or the kiddie fun pool on base here. We do playgroup with a group of kids once a week, we go for walks everyday just about. We examine flowers and trees (another facination of his) and he LOVES watching big trucks. Sometimes we'll just go drive around to see trucks and school buses out on the road or in parking lots! LOL We also do craft stuff alot, sometimes just simple things like finger painting, sometimes I'll find something structured to do too.

I think it's the everyday things that make your life magical. Yeah it's great to do special stuff too, and they will remember that, but they will also remember that everyday for as long as they remember, you read them a book before bed, or you knelt down and said prayers with them at night, or even ate dinner together as a family everynight. Those are the things I remember from my childhood. We had family traditions and whatnot, but I remember everynight my dad reading my sister and I a story. Even when I was old enough to read on my own, he still read us stories when he tucked us into bed. :)

Enough babbling from me.. I'm feeling chatty today! lol

Magical, as in tooth fairy, or magical as in respected & loved?

I''ll go ahead anyway. LOL I try not to yell and I don't hit. (Not that I don't get angry, lol Just I try to keep their dignity uppermost in my mind). Our rule from the beginning is "No put downs". The other is "No hitting". My kids are older, so I try to say 'yes' as much as I can without it making me crazy and with the kids understanding No sometimes. Yes to sleepovers, yes to too many friends in the yard, in the house. Yes to the hose and sprinkler and mudpies with stick candles in the sand pit. Yes to ice cream on hot nights and yes to popcorn and movies in bed.

I think a welcoming space, like a good treehouse, if you can, a basketball hoop for neighborhood pickup games & enough popsicles in the freezer to hand out to everyone after the game. (Of course urban kids have different space/needs. I am thinking about my not urban children). A well-stocked art closet is important to me. There is something about letting kids create that to *me* shows repect. (My response to a mother, wonderful as she was, who never let us play with anything messy, ever, ever lol). Playdough, paint, colored chalk, fun board games and knowing how to play cards are important.

One thing that my dh and I believe is critical to a healthy childhood are respectful sibling relationships. I don't mean they all have to love each other every minute of the day. But it means siblings are not to hurt each other- no hitting, no throwing crap at each other, no saying hurtful things about speed or lack there-of, body size, intelligence- we never encouraged, and actively discouraged competiton among our children. We never played the game of 'see who can run the fastest, get to the door etc first". We don't say "Your brother never did that" "Your sister never argues with me like this" etc.

Each child has their owns gifts and their own needs. Sometimes the oldest needs a break from being needed and setting the good example all the time, and the youngest needs to feel powerful, or be put in her place. We have always told our children that the way they treat each other will make or break their childhoods. If you are a little brother constantly getting pounded on, he will have sad memories of growing up. If you are always told you're too slow, or too fat or too skinny by a sib, that's what you will take to adulthood as your identity, no matter how decent your parents are. We remind them that being members of a family is not easy sometimes, but well worth it.

The other thing I have come to know about childhood is that you can't read too many books together, no matter how old you are. My 15 year old even gathers in to listen chapter books being read to the younger kids. Fairy tales, myths, folklore from around the world, silly and serious fiction and non fiction--anything. Just read and read a lot. I can't remember any better time from my own childhood than snuggling up with my mother as she read chapter after chapter.

Traditions are fun and if you do it once and the kids like it, they will remember it & it will be tradition. Holiday traditions are great, but I found that Pizza Night every Friday is just as important to kids.

It's also been important to us to teach the kids our values, through our deeds- recycling, buying organic food, buying used, walking instead of driving when we can, participating in our community, donating things, taking care of neighbors & family members, participating in our church community etc etc.


Laurie

Suzie-- that's a wonderful site! A new one for me. Thanks so much for that!!

Laurie

I wouldn't say that I had a "bad" childhood, exactly, but it wasn't much fun. But I read a lot, and created my own magic. I think the most pivotol work was a book I read sometime in elementary school called "The Changeling." I decided then and there that I had discovered the problem -- obviously, I was a changeling. For those of you who don't know, a changeling is when the fairies steal a human baby and replace it with one of their own. What I didn't realize back then is that this usually happens because the fairy baby is somehow "defective." Oh well ... perhaps I was. I was a very sad, sensitive, unhappy child and that is a hallmark of changelings -- they're just screaming or crying all the time. So anyway.... I spent much of my childhood alone, searching for my "real" parents and for signs of the fairies. Gosh, what I did then would be so dangerous by today's standards. I was always off in the woods, following creeks, etc. and always alone.

My mother was (is) a very good person and she helped me find my magic. But she was also a very sad person, so ... anyway. But I do remember things like ... In 5th grade, I was supposed to be the Dutch girl in a class play. No matter how we tried, we could NOT make a Dutch girl hat out of posterboard. I went to sleep worried about the next day, but when I woke up -- there was the hat! She told me the fairies must've left it. There were a few other occasions like that.

So in my life now, with my children, almost everything is magical. Magic is everywhere and we're always ready to STOP for it. Anabelle is 3 -- Everything in this world is new to her and all of it is beautiful. Driving down the road the other day, she called out about the beautiful purple flowers. It was buttercups growing wild beside the road. We pulled over and she collected herself a bouquet for we got back in the car and travelled on. And there's still much talk of fairies (of course!) The fun part about all this is the way that DH participates. For example....

We have a town square. One night, I wanted to go to the bookstore ALONE, so he and Belle stayed on the square to play. When I came back, they were sooooo excited because they had found a fairy house. It was a tree with some kind of open knothole a few feet from the bottom of the trunk. They had called into it and knocked for the fairies, etc. Belle was only 2 at the time, but she still remembers. Then, she and I were down in the creek the other day catching tadpoles. DH was sitting on the banks with our dogs. He was very interested in something on the ground behind him. When we got ready to leave, he showed Anabelle what he'd "found" -- a little fairy house, made of sticks and even a little bed inside with silky seed pods for a pillow. So before we could leave, Anabelle had to decorate the house with flowers on the roof and circling around to "surprise" the fairy when he got back home.

Everything is magical when you see it through the eyes of a 3-year-old. :butterfly

Oh, this is a great thread!! :D

We spend a lot of time outdoors. We hike to local waterfalls and gullies and spend hours there relaxing and exploring. When you're completely surrounded by ferns, and trees, babbling water and bird songs, you can't help but be transported to a magical land filled with fairies and wee folk.

I let the girls dress up like fairies and fair maidens when we run errands, if they ask... They love it, and they love making people smile.

We try to create magical play spaces. We set up the teepee outdoors, or drape playsilks under the pine trees to make fairy bowers.

I spend a good amount of time every day taking part in the girls make believe play. I get into it, making up accents and draping myself in playsilks if that's what the scenario calls for. I like to set up little stores for the girls, and farmers markets. We make signs and money, and props to go along with what we're playing. My Mom never really did this kind of playing with me, but I wanted her to. The girls love how involved I become in their play.

We do have fairies that occasionally stop by with little trinkets or notes for the girls when they have been good.

Besides doing my best to have a peaceful, happy atmosphere to our household, I make sure the girls are involved in what I'm doing. I let them make decisions while shopping, or when making dinner. We let them have opportunities at trying things that are still beyond their grasp. J brings them into his wood shop and lets them use some tools (under very careful supervision, of course).

Well, I've got to head out to the Post Office (with two fairies in tow), but I look forward to seeing other replies. and I can't wait to check out that link!

You are welcome for the link. I enjoy that site a lot. She also sends out a newsletter when she can.

We find little things everyday that are magical.

Today, Joshie and I were picking cherries at my moms. He was up on the ladder and tossed a cherry to me. Just by chance I caught it in my mouth (I'm getting a little embarrassed by this story, lol) and ate it. For us, this was magical. It was fun and funny. (I was able to catch one more and it made Joshie sooo happy. :happy: )

Also, we collected a beetle at my moms. We played with it and talked about it. We brought it home. He loves it and to me that's magical. He named it Itty Bitty. :heart:

Magic is where you find it. Magic is taking the time to not overlook the little things during the hustle and bustle of daily life. I try to not overschedule our days just for this reason.

;cool: Joshie's choice

I agree with you, Suzie! We find plently of little things each day that are magical!

For example, today while we were down under our apple trees I noticed a chickadee flitting about. It happened to be one of the ones we had sort of tamed during the Winter. Well, he led us right over to a hole in a stump and we got to see his nest, along with the Mama and eggs. We we're standing a little bit away from the nest, but the Papa chickadee was being so curious and friendly with us, coming within inches of us! We were all enchanted with his curious little expressive eyes...

My goal is that my children become adults who have wonderful memories of their childhood. I love hearing of new ideas for special little things that make moments magical.

My kids really enjoy our good morning and bedtime songs/rituals.

something that is really special to my dd is this secret journal we share. I picked up a cheap lined journal and wrote her a letter on the first page. I told her that this would be our secret book and she could ask or tell me anything in it. And that I would write to her and leave it for her to find. Then she can write back and leave it for me to find.

It started out as my attempt to get her to write more (sneaky homeschool mom tactic) but I've found it is wonderful for those times where she has something she wants to say but doesn't want to have to say it to my face.

I sometimes think the *magic* comes in taking time for the little things.

I'm not sure if what we're doing fits the word magical, but here's some of it:

I had a really great and happy childhood. My mom stayed home with us. My grandparents lived up the street, the others lived 100 miles away on a farm and we visited them often. Summertime on the farm was definitely magical! I have such fond memories of that time - one of my favorites is sitting out on the big porch swing and talking until it was way past dark. I had aunts and uncle who are young teens when I was born and I just thought they were the greatest. My grandparents were great, too.

I don't remember my mom doing a lot of crafty-type things with us. What I do remember is playing a lot, with her always nearby. We played outside all the time - I had a playhouse that my grandfather had built for my mother that I loved. We always had a garden and were always working in our yard.

For my own children, I feel that one of the best things I can do for them is to help them have wonderful memories of their childhoods like I have. So, some of the things we surround ourselves with are:

bird feeders, everywhere in our yard, because we love to watch the birds

hummingbird feeders, what a treat when those little guys pay a visit

we garden as much as possible: We just planted our pizza garden a couple of weeks ago and the planting and watching it grow are really fun. We also planted a sunflower house and hopefully will have time to plant a gourd/bean teepee. Would also love to plant a moon garden.

we read together, out loud, a lot

the children love to make clubhouses, out of playsilks or towels or sofa cushions

we do tons of science-type activities - because they're fun and we accidently learn stuff along the way

we tell stories - did you know the sun setting is actually the sun putting on his red jammies? All my kids love that story.

we paint a lot - watercolor, fingerpaint, etc. A favorite calming, rainy day activity

I don't always lead these activities. I supply the supplies and they go with whatever they want to do. My oldest daughter loves to do crafts and art with the younger children.

We don't do this kind of thing all day every day. But hopefully enough that they will look back on this time of their lives and smile.

What a great thread! So many great thoughts shared.

Danielle, I *love* the idea about your special notebook. I'm sure that will become a cherished memento of your relationship w/ your DD!

We do a lot of things that have already been mentioned. We have a pretty relaxed, laid back household. Rarely do we have a serious "time-based" schedule to follow, so we take things slowly and I try to make sure I don't rush through life so that we miss on the "little things". We spend a lot of time outside, taking walks, etc. Ethan loves to chase butterflies. One of our neighbors has tadpoles in his drainage ditch, so everytime we take a walk (at least 3 times a day for the doggie) we stop to watch the tadpoles and try to catch a glimpse of the grown up frogs that always hide when they hear us coming. We watch dragonflies and bumblebees, and love to be granted a peek at the deer or bunnies that sometimes are in our yard or woods. This week we need to hang our bird feeder and hummingbird feeder. Ethan's really been looking forward to that. We try to do activities based on the seasons (we put out findings for the birds this spring (dryer lint, string bits, fabric scraps) to help the birds build their nests. Ethan's gotten a *huge* kick out of that!

We too have really active fairies at our house ... the come around for each solstice, and for our birthdays. Ethan's birthday was just last week, and it was so great to watch him come downstairs for breakfast and find that the birthday fairies had decorated for him w/ balloons and streamers, and left him a small gift. Throughout the year, the fairies make their presence known by sometimes playing tricks, sometimes they leaving treats, just for no good reason :)

Basically, I want Ethan to have joyful memories and feel free to express his creativity, emotions, and thoughts, and know that he is hugely loved, cherished and respected.

My Mom was kind of hit or miss, but some things she got SOOOO right.
She is an artist and she used to draw our coloring books for us. Whatever we'd ask for, she'd sit down and draw for us to color in.
She was the queen of dress up, making all kinds of stuff, and then teaching us to sew when we were 5 or 6 so we could make our own doll clothes. She quilts and taught us how, and I remember one of my favorite things to do was sit under the center of a quilt on the frames and stare at the colors while she and her friends worked on it..
She took us for nature walks, identifying anything she could and having us make up names for the rest so we could remember them to go home and look them up. We had weird science projects-- red white and blue foaming salt clay volcanos for the 4th of July are a favorite memory.
We played in the rain. Held impromptu parades down the streets, wore tiara's for a whole day just because.
We played instruments and she had us compose songs for holidays, making a huge production about writing them out, wrapping them in ribbon and presenting them as gifts.
I think crafting is the major thing she did. I always had my hands in something. If I had an idea, we'd figure out how to make it. Holidays were always homemade and it clallenged us to think of what to do for others. She also rarely bought "craft supplies" so we really had to think.
Another thing that I loved that she did and I'm planning with my little girl is celebrating. My parents celebrated everything. There was national IceCream Month, the Blue Moon, Lewis Carroll's Birthday, Thomas Edison's Birthday, Kite Flying Day, etc. They tried to have at least one"extra" holiday month and they varied form year to year.
There are moments of my childhood that sparkle. Not all, but some that just shine.
-Hastings

My parents didn't other than Santa and that sort of thing. They didn't play with us. I don't remember having any toys, really. I'm sure I must have had a few, but I don't remember.

I try to find magic in the small things with Caroline. We found a bird's nest in the middle of the parking lot at dance class and spent a ton of time guessing what kind of bird it might have belonged to, etc.

I try to give her as many creative outlets as possible...playsilks, lots of open ended toys, tons of craft supplies, etc. It is really magical for ME to see her create in a way my parents wouldn't have even acknowledged.

We also have an elf, Alice, who lives in our walls. She keeps Santa informed throughout the year of our behavior. She also leaves notes and treats every other week or so. Sometimes if you ask her a question, she'll knock an answer on the wall. She also has been known to make some birthday gifts disappear. Hmmmm...silly little elf. I have to say Alice's presences adds a whole dimension of magic to our lives.

We have lots of make believe things we do. DH and I for quite some time have rubbed our cheeks against each other :o Sounds funny, but our youngest has picked up on it. Then we have "magic kisses" "sleepy time kisses" of course regular, butterfly and eskimo kisses. We have "bug spray" which is a spray bottle of linen stray with a fairy on it and I spray it in her room before bedtime to make the "mean bugs" go away and we have a chant we do to make them leave. We have many "magic" things- magic hairspray (water in a bottle that I spray in her hair so I can brush it), magic dust that doesn't exist but is make believe for all occasions. Anytime she hears the word magic it becomes exciting to her.

For our oldest we leave letters in her lunch or we'll just be silly. She's not as "into it" as our youngest is.

We build forts, as in all of us not just for the girls, we'll all dress up in our playsilks like hippies or we'll "bury" each other in silks. We sumo wrestle. We'll light candles at night and have nothing electronic on but music. We eat and drink imaginary foods. We pretend to be different animals. We'll pull out a cardboard box and play in it or color all over it (or both). We cloth diaper and kiss goodnight all her dolls, teddy bears, etc.

Our youngest comes up with creative things all on her own now. For instance she's the one who came up with feeding us imaginary food whenever. She came up with the bug spray. She'll do funny things like telling us there's a bug on her nose and we need to send her magic kisses to make it go away.

I'm interested in seeing what others have wrote. :)

eta: the outdoors and nature thing is a big thing for my youngest. Our oldest doesn't like the outdoors :eek: but my youngest and I can lie for hours watching a roly poly- really. To her that's just amazing- to see a small *bug* walk around. It really brings magic to *my* life to watch her curiosity.

We try to create a "magical" environment by giving them a sense of how wide and amazing the world we inhabit is. We do this through attending a liberal church that teaches them all about the beliefs and cultures of many different parts of the world. We also read a lot of mythology, lots of books about other cultures, hoping to show them that the world is full of possibilities. We want them to grow up believing that the world is a wonderous and magical place, and to respect the earth and all of its people and their diverse cultures and beliefs.

I finally got a chance to sit down and catch up on this thread. I'm so excited about all the ideas. Thanks for sharing, mamas.

I'm most excited to hear how many of you use nature and the outdoors to create magic. We're getting ready to move from the suburbs out to 2+ acres in the country. I can't wait for my children to have a place to play outside. We'll be able to see the stars. We haven't been able to see them here because of the light pollution.

I have a lot of trouble living "in the moment" when things get stressful. I'm getting better at slowing down and focusing on the important things, but I think it takes practice. It sounds like some of you are working on that, too.

Have a magical day!:)
Rebecca