And yelling to deal with agressive behavior like hitting and biting. Ds is looking for reactions but I just don't want him to think he can continue this behavior and I just find time out to heart wrenching for both of us.

Depends on when/where it is happening and who is on the recieving end.

If I was out somewhere and my child couldn't behave - I'd leave. Very effective when you are playing with their friends. I've also made one of my children sit in the van while the others played (I sat with them and read a book - with the heat or ac on if needed).

At home, depriving the agressor of the company of the victim works well for us. If hitting happens over a toy - the toy goes away.

Sometimes at that age they hit because you have told them to do something they don't want - clean up your toys. You take them and make them do it anyway. You hold their hands and have them pick up the toy and put it away. Instead of yelling, you physically do it with them.

HTH - Melinda