amitymamaThe Attachment Parenting Community

Daniel's Mama · 10-29-2005, 06:59 PM

okay, I love him to pieces but today he's been pushing my buttons and has gotten me to the point of yelling. I hate to yell, I know it's unproductive and it's disrepectful, but he won't Listen To Me when I speak to him in a normal voice.

we have a new kitten and he's carrying her all over the place, like she's a doll. poor kitty just hangs there, occasionally she'll fight to get lose but he tightens his grip telling me she's just getting comfortable.

then when the kitten is on the floor, free from his grasp, and she approaches our older cat, he's in the middle of them, trying to referee them. the older cat is still at the "hiss and spit stage" with the new baby. I've tried and dh has tried to explain that the girls just need time to figure each other out, to leave them alone, but he just gets in the middle again.

oh yeah and dh has been in his workshop all day, so it's mostly me trying to parent today (grrrrrrrrrr!).

what would you do? what do you do? am I worried over nothing?

TIA

Charity · 10-29-2005, 08:15 PM

We had similar problems with my ds when we got our puppy. He was 6 at that time. I read an article in a pet magazine about kids and pets, and the 6 yr old age described my ds well. Apparently his behavior with our pet was similar to many children at that age with pets. Annoying, but definitely normal.

I think I'd take the kitty from his hands if he's playing too much with her, and not letting her have some space. As you take the kitty from him, maybe say "You've been holding her enough, it's time to give her some space to do what 'she' wants to do". If 10 minutes later he scoops her back up, repeat the process. Maybe point out all the things she is doing when he isn't holding her, and show him how happy she is to be able to do those things. Point out if he was continuing to hold her she wouldn't be able to do those things, and she might be sad.

If that doesn't work, you could always pick him up and carry him around when he's trying to play with his toys. That might help him to visually see why the kitty needs to be put down, in the same way he'd like to be put down to go play.

Maybe the two cats can get to know each other in the evenings while your ds is sleeping?