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Different things depending on the situation
#1 both kids get time out where I can see them both and I talk to them about appropriate behaviour.
#2 Toy goes in time out
#3 I inform them that since they can't play nicely, playtime is over it's now time to clean up. Then I have them both start cleaning up their room and the living room. You can add any other jobs you have that you want done. My mom used this with us all the way through high school. This was also the consequence of whining "I'm bored". The response would be "o.k., go clean the bathroom/wash the dishes/vacuum the rug/rake the lawn etc".
I don't send them to their room - that's not a good consequence since all their toys are in there. We live in a basement suite and all three of my kids share a room and it's right off our living room/kitchen area. It's tough on them to be confined in such a small area all the time. I think that's part of the problem. I can't let them in our bedroom or office w/o me or dh because they just get into too much stuff.
I also try to follow up any consequence with a structured activity. (craft, stories, walk outside, cooking project) My kids are cleaning up right now and then we'll read some stories. I find they do better when we alternate structured and unstructured time compared to when I just leave them to their own devices for most of the day.
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~ Cheryl ~ single mama to
Melissa (9), Michael (8), Madeleine (7)
twins Megan & Maribeth (4)
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