Its so nice that you're concerned for your friend
The coffee (caffeine) really is ok some babies don't like it or their systems can't handle it but most are ok with it.
http://www.lalecheleague.org/FAQ/caffeine.html
As for the pot... well, here is some info...
http://www.kellymom.com/smoking.html#marijuana
http://www.babycenter.com/expert/3131.html
HTH!