Family Constellations

Discussion in 'EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique' started by Natalia, Nov 8, 2007.

  1. Natalia

    Natalia New Member

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    O.k. Deborah. :) Tell us about this.
  2. Linda

    Linda Amity's Focus Member

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  3. Deborah

    Deborah New Member

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    I wish it were easy to describe! Family Constellations is about looking into and accessing the morphic energy of a family system, especially including ancestors. Its premise is that unresolved issues from our past generations show up as current issues we carry. It's not karmic work at all -- it's all about the energy and connections of the family and that anything excluded will fight to be included.


    Often the work is done in a group but the energy can also be accessed individually.

    The goal of the work is to put things back in order. Order of love is very
    important. So if you imagine a mother taking from her child, that blocks the energy flow. The energy is meant to flow from parent to child all the way through the generations.

    What feels so good about the work is that problems that we think are our own turn out to be energetic entanglements of the family system. It's not our fault and it's easy to fix.

    I bring this work into my EFT work often. It gives me a framework to explore lots of issues.

    The most powerful way to experience F.C. is to take a workshop.

    Also, John Payne's books on it are amazingly easy to understand and show the power of F.C. (Books)


    HTH,
    Deb.
  4. Natalia

    Natalia New Member

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    That sounds awesome. I have been noticing a lot lately, that the things that bother me most about my daughter, are things that I am not happy about in myself. And I speak to my daughter differently than I do to my boys. I speak to her the way my mother spoke to me, with this "How could you do something so stupid?" tone. And I hate myself when I hear it. And I apologize to her. But it was already said. I am so sad about this. And working on it. But I have thought that there is the trickle down of generations here and set as one of my goals for 2007 to "heal the mother-daughter wound." I know my mother had a difficult relationship with her own mother. Not sure how much futher it goes back.

    So, I would love tool for dealing with this and will check out the book. Once I've moved.

    Thank you Linda for bringing it up and Deborah for describing.
  5. Deborah

    Deborah New Member

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    Glad it sounds helpful to you. (when the time is right)

    I think you will find lots of ways to work with mother-daughter relations.

    One huge and common area to explore are past miscarriages and/or abortions - either your mother or your grandmother. I think once you read about it, you'll get the feel for it.

    It's poignant work, and powerful.

    Love,
    Deborah
  6. Natalia

    Natalia New Member

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    I miscarried before Stephania was born. My mother miscarried before I was born.

    I also read the old thread Linda linked too. Lots of things to think about and tap on.
  7. Deborah

    Deborah New Member

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    What I am going to offer here sounds simple but is very powerful work. I offer it now but I know you will know when the time is right.

    What's often needed is:
    • Honoring and seeing the miscarried baby.
    • Claiming the proper birth order.

    So I miscarried before my son Matthew was born. I have two younger daughters as well. I used to say I was mother to three -- now I know I am mother to four.

    Healing words include: you will always have a place in my heart, you will always have a place in my and your father's hearts, you were the first (or whatever is appropriate).

    I might introduce Matthew as my firstborn or eldest but inside I am acknowledging he's really a second child.

    The profound feelings of relief around claiming rightful birthplace are huge ...

    So for having a sibling miscarriage, healing words include:

    I miss you.
    I miss having you as an older brother/sister.
    I am your younger sister.
    You were the first and we miss you.

    All this work is done in what is called the morphogenic field -- so it's a matter of entering the field and doing the work. It's just intention and energy.

    Hugs,
    Deb.
  8. Natalia

    Natalia New Member

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    Deb. Do you actually tell your children about this? I think my children would be understanding, but would also find it disconcerting to have this come up suddend=ly.
  9. Morgansma

    Morgansma Active Member

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    So you can work on emotions from family members that passed, right? With that, do you think (or have you experienced even I guess) the work would bring that person's energy to you? Or if you're working on someone that you had a bad relationship with, do you think it could bring those negative energies to you? Strange, I know. I have "sensitivities" (for lack of a better word) but I don't want all of that on the www. Hope that makes some sense.
  10. Deborah

    Deborah New Member

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    I have talked about this with my children. It was a very gentle conversation and after I had done some intense work around it at a F.C. workshop. I think because I had really processed things it wasn't a big deal for them. They were more curious. But also they were still somewhat young (5,6,8) when I told them. She occasionally comes up in conversation -- they'll talk about the angel baby.
  11. Deborah

    Deborah New Member

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    Hi Kimberly,
    (Feel free to take the question to the private forum if you want where there's more privacy)


    Absolutely we can work with energy from family members who have passed.
    Most of F.C. work is with folks who have passed on. However in F.C. there's always more than meets the eye and the bad relationship between two folks often is about something and someone else. (Which is such a relief!)

    In the context of F.C. I have had no issues with picking up the person's negative energy, both personally and with clients and in workshops. I might experience their energy but there has never been an issue with it sticking around. There's always resolution. If you go to a F.C. workshop, it shouldn't be an issue and if it is, they know how to address it. In a F.C. workshop, other folks represent your family members so it's very safe and informative.

    Personally, I have had much training in energy work to develop and "harness" my energy skills .... and I did have one time earlier on in my life where I got spooked and had to get help.

    So I'm giving you a mixed answer. If you are concerned, then don't do the work without someone else. And normally it is not an issue.
  12. Morgansma

    Morgansma Active Member

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    Thank you so much Deborah!!

    (The FC aspect really got me thinking about so many things.)

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